


I've Known You

by Jayde_Amali



Series: I Know You 'verse [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bonding, M/M, Reincarnation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-26
Updated: 2013-11-10
Packaged: 2017-12-13 01:49:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 24,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/818547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jayde_Amali/pseuds/Jayde_Amali
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabriel's known Dean for almost a millennium. Dean only knows him as Loki. Will the truth tear them apart or bring them closer together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I had an idea that every angel has a single human soul that they belong to as a bondmate. The relationship between angel and soul could range from best friends to lovers. It's comforting for the angel to be around their bondmate. So when Gabriel left heaven, he never thought he'd find his. Not to mention Lucifer in the pit and sealed away. Two archangels who never thought they'd be allowed just a small bit of comfort.

Circa 1053, Norway

When Gabriel first felt the pull, he flinched in irritation. He tried to focus on the missionary that he was pranking. The man just wouldn't give up. He wouldn't leave his beloved Norway alone. He was downright pissed that Christianity had found its way here. He didn't want or need that kind of attention.

The pull came again, this time laced with fear. Gabriel couldn't ignore it a second time. It called to something else in him. Something he'd buried deep down. He sighed and left the missionary to go seek out the source of the pull. He popped into a newly built church, remaining invisible. Curious he was, stupid he wasn't. He found the young man, maybe fifteen, staring at the blockaded door in terror. Terror that yanked at Gabriel's very fibers.

The young man nearly screamed at the booming sound outside the doors. People had lay siege to this church and were using a battering ram to get in. Gabriel didn't hear either. He was staring in rapt fascination at the teenager in front of him. It wasn't the body that caught his attention. It was the soul. The soul shone bright even as it quivered in fear.

A crack resounded as the barrier started to give way. Another crack and the door flung open. Gabriel was drawn away from the teenager as the young man tried to hide behind the altar. Turning, he saw those who would harm this soul. That he could not allow to happen. He snapped a barrier up between himself and the mob. He understood them. He completely got it. They didn't want Christianity intruding here any more than he did, but that soul cried out to him in the most primal sense. He couldn't let them hurt that soul.

The mob became angrier when they couldn't get past the barrier. Gabriel merely smirked to himself and went to check on the teenager. He made himself visible, only long enough to offer his hand to the young man. Once it was taken, he took both of them away. It was just in time as well. The church began to burn.

Gabriel let the teenager go when they were safe. He studied the young man before speaking softly. "What's your name?"

"David." The teenager responded after a moment, his voice trembling. "Did God send you?" He was clearly in awe of this being in front of him. The one who had saved him.

Gabriel shook his head, then shrugged. "No. Yes. No. I don't know." He wanted to look away, but couldn't. That soul was just too fascinating. He knew he was staring. He felt reassurance flow over him.

David smiled so faintly that it took Gabriel a moment to realize it was there. "Who are you?"

Gabriel hesitated. What should he say? To tell David that he was Loki would scare him. That was certain. Without a decision, he opened his mouth to tell David that who he was didn't matter. What came out surprised even himself. "Gabriel. They call me Gabriel."

"You _were_ sent by God." David clasped his hands in front of him in prayer as he dropped to his knees. "Our Father..." He started.

Gabriel shook his head. "No, he didn't. At least I don't think he did." He sighed. "I don't even know why I told you that. I haven't used that name in a long time, David." He reached out to take hold of David's hands, resting his hands over David's clasped ones. "I go by Loki now."

David looked up at Gabriel and shook his head. "No. You're an angel. You can't just stop being one. Why would you want to?" He avoided the mention of Loki.

Gabriel managed to tear his gaze away from David's face to look at their hands. He thought of telling David that it wasn't important and then make him forget the whole conversation when it happened again. He opened his mouth, and out came the truth. "I was tired of the fighting so I left home. Came down here. Went pagan." He frowned and looked at David. "And I have no clue what's going on!" He shook his head and pulled away, moving as far away from David as he could without leaving. "What is it about you?"

David sat back on his heels, lowering his hands. "Gabriel?"

Gabriel hissed. "Don't call me that!" The pull was beginning to pulse. A single word was on the pulse. He looked skyward, tears in his eyes. Was it possible? Would his Father allow him this one simple reassurance on Earth?

David stood up and started toward Gabriel. "All right, Loki, then. What's wrong?" He reached out on instinct, wanting to comfort the angel-who-refused-to-be-an-angel.

Gabriel looked at David, fear, hope, and underneath it all, devotion in his eyes. "He's given me to you. You're my bondmate."

David fell to his knees again as he saw the look in Gabriel's eyes. "Loki?" He kept his hand stretched out.

Gabriel knelt in front of David. "I don't know what I could have done? I left home. I abandoned my brothers and sisters. I went pagan. I rebelled against everything, including Him. And he still gives me to you." He closed his eyes as he felt arms wrap around him hesitantly at first, then with conviction. "I'm allowed this one comfort, David. Just this one. I must have done something right."

 

November 2, 1983

Gabriel stood outside the house in Lawrence, Kansas. He watched as Azazel killed Mary Winchester. He closed his eyes against the knowledge that he could have stopped it from happening. Instead, he chose not to interfere. He watched as Dean carried Sam out from the house. He moved quickly then, before John could escape the house.

Without revealing himself, he knelt by the Dean's side and began to whisper into the boy's ear, knowing his sub-conscience would hear. "Dean, listen to me very carefully. I know you don't remember me right now, but we've been together for centuries. You will dream of me and not know why. You may even fall in love with me. When you're older, call for me. I'll come. Until then, know that I'm watching over you and I will keep you and your brother safe." He had to flee then because John Winchester came to collect his boys. He left a single coin on a string on the ground near Dean's left foot.

Dean frowned a little as he looked around. He thought he'd heard something. A flash caught his eye and he leaned down and picked up the coin after John had taken Sam from him. Without thinking about it, he put the simple necklace on, tucking it under his shirt. He would dream that night of fire and a man with amber eyes holding him close to protect him from it, whispering words of reassurance. It was the first of many dreams. Each time, that man would be there. Each time, he felt safe.


	2. Chapter 2

January 24, 1997

Dean Winchester sat outside of the crappy motel his dad had stashed him and Sam in. He still had to watch Sam. He wanted to be out there with his dad. He'd already dropped out of high school and had caught hell from his sub-conscience on that. The man he dreamed about had screamed at him for what felt like hours. His dad, however, had just shrugged and suggested Dean get a GED instead.

It was his eighteenth birthday. Instead of presents and a cake, he got Lucky Charms and a kid brother to baby sit. His dad had left earlier with strict instructions to take Sam to school and sit in the parking lot all day to keep him safe. When he'd mentioned the date, he could tell his dad had forgotten. He'd forgotten. Sam, however, hadn't, and had tried to make the day a little better for Dean. Hell, he'd even gotten Dean a pack of baseball cards. He had them in his wallet now. 

Dean stepped outside the motel room after Sam had gone to bed. He sat down on the curb, sighed, and pulled his jacket around him tighter. It was one of those days that he wished the man from his dreams wasn't just a dream. Strange for him to admit, but he'd fallen in love with a dream.

Dean looked up at what few stars he could see. "Look, I just don't think I can do this anymore. Dad doesn't care. Sammy's probably the only reason I'm still here. If it weren't for him, I'd have checked out a long time ago, but I've learned to believe in a lot of things most people don't know exist. I know this is a long shot, but if you're real, I need you." He whispered the words softly.

"I'm real, Dean." The soft response beside him didn't startle Dean. Instead, Dean took it in stride.

"Oh." Dean closed his eyes and leaned in against the other man. "I fell asleep again. I'm sleeping and I'll wake up soon." He felt arms around him, then warmth seeping through him.

"You're awake now, Dean." Gabriel rested a hand on Dean's cheek, guiding his head to turn so Gabriel could look in Dean's eyes. "I mean it. You're awake. I'm here. I'm truly here." He placed a hand against Dean's chest where the coin still resided against his skin.

Dean should have been startled. He knew he should have run. Gotten to a weapon. Something. Called his dad even. Instead he started crying. He'd never admit to it though. His hands curled into fists in Gabriel's jacket as his whole body started shaking. 

Gabriel let Dean cry. He just held Dean tight. "I've always been with you, Dean. Always. You've never been alone." He let his senses flow out into the Winchester's motel room. He sensed Sam, asleep. No sign of John. He popped Dean and himself into the room and into one of the beds.

Dean was grateful, even if a little disoriented. He couldn't be sure, but he thought he felt something as soft as feathers surrounding him just before sleep overtook him.

Morning came swiftly and saw John Winchester returning from his hunt early. He came in through the door before Gabriel could get safely away. He was stunned at seeing the man standing next to Sam's bed. 

Gabriel had been checking on Sam briefly before he was going to return to Dean's side. When the door opened, he cursed at himself for being so careless. He looked over, making eye contact for the second time with John Winchester.

The first? John had hunted him before. He'd barely managed to escape without being staked, not that it would have killed him, but best to not let John know that. They both knew that John thought he knew who and what Gabriel was. John swung the shotgun toward Gabriel on reflex.

"Oh, please, we both know that won't work." Gabriel was angry at himself for this mess. He wasn't in a position where a copy could distract John. This was all him and deep down he was scared. Not for himself, but for Dean.

John nods. "Yeah, I know, but it'll hurt like hell." He was about to pull the trigger when Dean sat up in the bed, taking in the situation.

"Dad! Wait!" Dean held out his hands toward John. Both John and Gabriel looked at Dean. John in surprise, Gabriel with devotion. John flickered his gaze back and saw the way Gabriel was looking at his son and saw red.

John charged at Gabriel, shotgun forgotten. There was no way he was going to let this pagan trickster have access to his family like this. The second before he made contact with Gabriel, he felt himself frozen.

"Woah, wait a minute there, Johnny." Gabriel shook his head. "I don't know what you're worried about here, but believe me, I had no say in any of this. Mmm-kay?" He shrugged. "Dean already knows everything. It's up to him to tell you. If he wants to tell you." He looked at Dean. "I'll be nearby." He leaned down, startling Dean, as he pressed his lips to Dean's in a light kiss that didn't last nearly long enough for either to be happy with. Gabriel disappeared afterward with a snap and John fell to the floor in a heap.

"Dean?" John looked up at his son warily. "What the hell is going on?"

Dean sighed and shook his head. "I don't know how to explain it." He ran his hands through his short hair, trying to straighten it out from the night's sleep.

"Try." John growled out while standing up to loom over Dean.

Dean was nervous about speaking since John looked like he's already made up his mind about the situation.

Sure enough, an hour later, Dean was thrown out of the motel room. Gabriel went to his side, frowning. He took Dean with him as he left for one of his safe houses. He'd keep an eye on Sam. If John started corrupting Sam against Dean, then he'd yank Sam out of there. Right now, he needed to focus on only Dean.

Dean, however, changed Gabriel's plans. The following day, Sam came to live with them after a near fist fight between Dean and John. Gabriel had to step in to keep them from killing each other. Wary at first, Sam finally warmed up to Gabriel.


	3. Chapter 3

2006

John Winchester had caught up with his boys when Meg led all three of them into a trap. She'd gotten the story from Sam about how John had chased Dean off and subsequently Sam himself. She had thought it would be hilarious to get father and sons in the same room and let them go after each other. Her plan backfired when the Winchesters seemed more than capable of working together to escape.

The fireworks came after they had gotten back to the motel where Sam and Dean were staying. They had allowed John to come in, but only if he didn't start anything. Dean seemed quite willing to try and mend things with John. Sam was willing to follow Dean's lead.

Dean handed Sam a beer, then held one out for John. He nodded when John took the bottle and popped the top. He opened his own and took a long pull. "So, what brings you here?"

John sat down in a chair at the small table. "I'm tracking the demon that killed your mother."

Both Sam and Dean paused and looked at John. Dean recovered first. "Well, good luck with that."

John shook his head. "Dean, don't be this way, son."

Something in Dean snapped at that. "Be what way? As I remember it, you threw me out."

John stood up, setting the bottle down on the table. "You have to understand. I wasn't thinking clearly at that time. All I knew was that a trickster had somehow gotten you to think you were in love with him." He shook his head and started to speak again.

Dean interrupted him. "We've been over this once. Nothing has changed since then. I'm still with Loki." He glanced at Sam and when Sam nodded, Dean left the room.

John started to follow, but Sam caught hold of his arm. "Let him go. He's still hurting over the whole thing. He needed you to understand back then. You didn't and I think that killed a part of him that is just now healing." Sam let go, only after he was sure John wasn't going to go running after Dean.

John nodded and sat back down. "I know I wasn't the best father in the world, Sam, but I did the best I could."

Sam nodded. "I know. Just give him some time to come around." He paused then shrugged. "It'd help if you'd accept Loki, you know."

John rubbed his eyes and shook his head. "Sam, I hunt things like Loki. It's hard for me to accept that Dean chose a monster over family."

Sam sighed and sat down on his bed. "You pushed him into that choice, dad. He wouldn't have had to choose if you had just listened to him and watched them together. Just for a little bit." He shrugged. "I mean, Loki worships Dean. I saw it the first day I was with them."

John leaned back, picking up his beer. He took a drink, then set the bottle back down. "Okay, Sam. I'll try."

After John left the motel, they wouldn't see him again until after the brothers were in a car wreck. Sam had called John. John had dropped everything to go to the hospital where Dean's life hung in the balance.

Sam had given John a brief warning that Loki was in the room with Dean. John barely nodded before opening the door and stepping inside. He glanced toward Gabriel, but kept most of his attention on Dean.

Gabriel was sitting by Dean's bedside, one hand cradled in his. He looked up at John, eyes narrowed. He tensed, but when he caught Sam's eyes at the door, Sam shook his head. Gabriel nodded to Sam, but remained wary.

John swallowed hard, then looked to Gabriel. "Don't take this the wrong way, but why haven't you done anything to help him?"

Gabriel's eyes flickered up to John, then back to Dean. "Because he's in between." He reached out his other hand and smoothed Dean's hair back. "I can't do anything until he's in one place or the other."

John frowned and shook his head. "Okay, pretend I don't understand a word you just said."

Gabriel snorted. "You didn't." He sighed and looked up at John. "He's not dead. He's also not alive. His soul isn't where it should be. It's wandering. I can't call him back unless he's dead."

John's frown deepened. He looked at Sam. "Sam, would you mind grabbing me some caffeine?"

Sam nodded and stepped away from the room. Once he had gone, John turned back to Gabriel. "Okay, cut the crap. Who the hell are you?"

Gabriel's eyes shifted from Dean's face to John. "I never lied about my name, John Winchester. I am Loki."

John shook his head. "But that's not all you are. I've done the research on Loki. He can't bring people back from the dead."

Gabriel sighed and looked back at Dean. "Mary once said that angels were watching over Dean." He fell silent then.

John watched Gabriel for a long time, then nodded. "What if his soul never finds it's way back? What then?"

Gabriel looked at John in no small amount of irritation. "He will." He looks back at Dean. "He will." The second time around, he doesn't sound so certain.

John stayed silent until Sam returned. He sent Sam to Bobby's to get some things. He kept what he was going to do away from Gabriel and Sam. When Sam returned, he was upset and tried to confront John. John waved him away and sent him to keep vigil over Dean with Gabriel.

When John returned to the room, Dean was awake and talking to Sam and Gabriel. Gabriel looked up, saw John, and immediately stood up, staring at John in disbelief. He shook his head and sat back down. John barely smiled at Gabriel, though he nodded toward him. He sent Sam out of the room and asked Gabriel if he could talk to Dean in private.

Dean nodded to Gabriel, letting him know it was okay. He watched Gabriel as he left, then looked at John.

A few moments later, John left the room, looking at Gabriel. He wasn't surprised when Gabriel motioned for them to take a walk. The two of them walked down the corridor.

Gabriel spoke softly to John. "His soul would have moved on. The reaper was talking him down. If you'd have waited, I'd have been able to save him."

John stopped outside an empty room. He turned to look at Gabriel, seeking something in those amber eyes. "I know, but I had to do this for my boy. I had to make up for a lot of things. I have just one question I would like answered before I go?" Gabriel raised a brow, inviting him to speak. "Who are you? I mean what's your real name?"

Gabriel looked down at the floor, then up at John. "I shouldn't tell you, you know. If they learn who I am in the pit, Dean's gonna be in a world of hurt."

John shook his head. "They won't get it out of me."

Gabriel studied John for a long moment, then nodded. "Before I was known as Loki, I was called Gabriel."

John nodded, glanced down the corridor, then back to Gabriel. He smiled and nodded once more. "Thank you. Take care of my boys, Gabriel." He didn't wait for an answer before he walked down the hallway and into a room.

Gabriel stood there, watching John's progress. He looked away when he sensed Azazel in the room with John and finally John's soul being ripped away from this world. He sensed Sam coming and turned to walk back to Dean's room.

Sam found John on the floor and screamed for help. Gabriel helped Dean out of the bed and to the room where the doctors and nurses were trying to help John. Dean never asked Gabriel to help. He knew that Gabriel would have helped already if he could have.

The brothers had to bury their father. Well, salted and burned, but it was the same sentiment. They took care of it quietly. Gabriel stood beside Dean. He didn't speak. He just stood there. Dean knew Gabriel was there and was grateful to him. When it was over, Dean turned to look at Gabriel. He glanced at Sam and at Sam's nod, Dean took Gabriel's outstretched hand. Gabriel snapped them away, leaving Sam to make the drive to Bobby's.


	4. Chapter 4

 2007

Dean and Sam arrived at the college campus to investigate strange occurrences. The brothers were supposed to have a meeting with the janitor of the building that the professor took a swan dive out of an office. The janitor was apparently too busy to meet with the hunters as he never showed up.

The brothers split up to do some investigating on their own. When they arrived back at their motel, Sam couldn't find his laptop and Dean was blamed. Shortly after, Dean would find the tires on the Impala flat and Sam's money clip on the ground.

Bobby was called and after he arrived, they all came to the realization that it was a trickster. Dean was far from amused when Bobby laid that on him. Sam muttered something about needing a beer and grabbed Bobby on the way out. They cleared out of the motel room before Dean shouted out. "Loki! Get your ass over here! Now!"

Gabriel had been watching them ever since they hit town. He couldn't resist drawing them into his tricks. He really couldn't. He was, however, surprised that Dean didn't recognize it immediately. He showed up, lounging on Dean's bed. "Yes, lover boy?" He waggled his brows, grinning up at Dean.

Dean clenched his jaw and fumed for a moment before shaking his head. "You son of a bitch. You _know_ I can't stand being dragged into your games."

Gabriel stuck out his lower lip in a mock pout. "But Dean-o, you used to love them when you were younger. In fact, you had some of the best ideas." He rested his head on his hand, elbow pressed in against the mattress. He heard Dean's growl and knew he was building up to a blood pressure high and needed to calm down. "Okay, okay. I'm sorry. Sheesh." He rolled his eyes.

Dean's growl turned into a grumble and he sat down next to Gabriel, facing away from him. "No, you're not." He felt Gabriel's hand rubbing over his back. He sighed and turned to look at Gabriel. "This is what you do. You're never sorry for what you do."

Gabriel sat up then, moving to kneel beside Dean, resting back on his heels. "True that, but I am sorry for pulling you and Sam into it. I shouldn't have done that." He nudges Dean until his back is pressed up against Gabriel's front.

Dean leaned back into Gabriel, closing his eyes as Gabriel ran his fingers through Dean's short hair. He let Gabriel pull him back further until they were both on the bed with Dean's head resting on Gabriel's shoulder.

Gabriel smiled down at Dean. He waited until Dean slipped into sleep and he allowed his wings out to cover Dean. He pulled them back as Dean shifted, but relaxed as he realized Dean was only settling down. He knew Dean was tired. He'd been keeping tabs on how little Dean had been sleeping. With no danger around, it was the best time to get him to sleep a little.

When Sam and Bobby came back, Gabriel wasn't sure if he'd hidden his wings fast enough, but the way that Sam frowned quizzically at him, he was almost positive he hadn't. Bobby on the other hand, looked shocked to see Gabriel there. However, Gabriel wasn't getting up. He also didn't do anything that would wake Dean. He let Dean sleep.

Bobby, however, wasn't so polite. "Who the hell is he?" He questioned loudly, pointing at Gabriel. "And don't you shush me, boy." He turned the pointing finger on Sam.

Dean blinked awake and lurched forward when he realized Bobby and Sam were back. He saw the direction Bobby was glaring and turned to look at Gabriel. "Oh. Uhh." He looked back at Bobby. "I can explain. Really. I can."

Bobby turned his attention toward Dean. "So explain."

Dean frowned as he saw the same look in Bobby's eyes that he did in his dad's eyes. He looked at Sam, then back at Gabriel. Sam shrugged and Gabriel just nodded to Dean.

Bobby raised a brow expectantly. "I'm listening, Dean."

Dean looked away. "Look, Bobby, the last time I tried explaining this whole thing, well, dad threw me out." He rubbed his hand over the back of his neck. "I don't know if he ever told you about that."

Bobby raised both brows. "Wait a minute," he pointed at Gabriel, "he's the one that you left for?"

Sam shook his head. "Bobby, Dean didn't leave. Dad threw Dean out. He didn't want Dean to date a guy."

Dean sighed and looked at Bobby. "It's more than that. Umm, well, he's Loki." He cleared his throat, holding up a hand to stop Bobby from talking. He saw the wide eyed disbelief. "Yeah, that Loki. Ever since I was four, he's been there for me. When dad wasn't there, Loki was." He shrugged. "I don't know what part scared dad more. The fact that Loki was Loki or Loki was a guy. Or both."

Bobby finally managed to speak after swallowing several times. "Loki, huh?" He looked toward Gabriel, then back to Dean. "He treat you right?" He nodded after Dean nodded with a soft 'yeah, he does'. "Okay. Okay. Your dad never mentioned that. Only that you'd chosen to go off with some guy rather than stay and help him. He also told me you took Sam away too."

Dean relaxed a bit after he realized that Bobby wasn't going to react like John had. "Bobby, you gotta understand that I was eighteen and dad didn't even remember my birthday. Up until that day, I thought Loki was only a dream. I'd never seen him when I was awake before. He stayed that night and watched over Sam and me. He didn't get away fast enough the following morning. Dad nearly shot him. I had to stop him. Dad saw how Loki looked at me and he lost it."

Bobby frowned, but nodded. "He said you'd had a guy spend the night when you were supposed to be watching Sam."

Dean nodded. "I guess you could see it that way, but I trusted Loki even then. When Loki left that morning, I tried to explain everything to dad. Including the dreams. He demanded that I never see Loki again and that I tell him to never invade my dreams again." He looked down and started picking lint off the bedspread. "I couldn't do that. I couldn't do it because I was already in love with Loki."

Gabriel leaned forward, running his hands over Dean's shoulders. "And I wouldn't have stayed away." He looked over at Bobby.

Whatever Bobby saw in Gabriel's eyes seemed to convince him since after looking at Gabriel for a long moment, he nodded to Dean. "So how does Sam fit into all of this?"

Dean shrugged. "I figured that Loki could provide a stable home for Sam, so I asked him if we could bring Sam to live with us. I wanted so much for Sam. The stable home. A stable school. No more jumping around. Even college. Dad wouldn't hear of it. He wanted Sam to stay with him, learning to be a hunter. He never really considered that Sam didn't want that."

Sam raised his brows. "Dean?" He looked stunned as he sat down. "I didn't think either of you noticed that."

Dean looked at Sam, then shrugged. "Well, I did. I saw how unhappy you were being moved from place to place. Loki wanted to just keep an eye on you from a distance. I made him take me back to get you that day."

Bobby kept watch on Gabriel rather than on Dean or Sam. He watched how Gabriel's expression softened as Dean talked about Sam and hardened as Dean talked about John. He still looked surprised by the whole thing.

Gabriel kept contact with Dean, but also seemed to know to keep some distance as well. He looked at Sam, though his eyes flickered to Bobby briefly. He knew he was being watched. "Sam, if I had known how unhappy you were, I'd have taken you with me the day I took Dean. I wouldn't have waited."

Dean frowned as he looked back at Gabriel. "How could you not know?"

Gabriel raised both brows. "Dean, I'm not as attuned to him as you are. I knew you were miserable. I didn't know he was too. When you asked me to go back, we went. I never thought it was as bad as it really was." He ran a hand over Dean's arm from shoulder down to hand. He wrapped his fingers around Dean's.

Sam and Bobby looked at each other, then back at the couple. They started to inch toward the door, torn between getting out of there or watching to see what happens next.

Dean shook his head and sighed. "No, you're right. I shouldn't expect you to know what I never told you." He looked down at Gabriel's hand, then closed his fingers around Gabriel's.

Gabriel smirked. "Oh, wait, I'm right about something?" He started to laugh. "I don't think I've ever heard you say that before."

Dean frowned at Gabriel, trying to look serious. The fact that Gabriel only laughed more told him it wasn't working. "Loki, so help me...." He shook his head, the frown turning into a small smile.

Bobby and Sam stepped out and closed the door behind them. They left the motel and half way to the bar, Bobby finally asked the question that had been bugging Sam since they stepped into the room. "Was I imagining things or did that trickster have wings?"

Sam shrugged a shoulder. "Unless we're both imagining the same thing, yeah, Loki had wings." He looked at Bobby for a moment, then Bobby nodded and turned the car around, heading for the library. "Bobby?"

Bobby shook his head. "I'm not sure he's a trickster, Sam. I don't know what he is, but I think he's lying to you and to Dean."

Sam frowned, looking over at Bobby. "What do you mean?"

Bobby glanced at Sam. "Loki? He's a Norse God. He's a shapeshifer, but has never had wings before."

Sam nodded and stared out at the road. "I'm not sure either, Bobby." He sighed. "I've wanted to confront Loki, but at the same time, if I'm wrong, I don't want him to get pissed at me."

Bobby made a noncommittal sound as they pulled into the library parking lot. He and Sam got out and went into the library, heading for the mythology books.

Sam pulled several books that covered Norse mythology. They started with those. When nothing came from it, they branched out to other pagan gods that did have wings. Sam kept shaking his head and rejecting them citing that the wings didn't look right.

Bobby closed his book and looked over at Sam. "It'd help if you told me exactly what details you were looking for, your know."

Sam looked up from his book. "I've found feathers, Bobby. Tawny feathers. They're about as long as my arm from here to here." He touches his forearm around the midpoint, then the tip of his middle finger.

Bobby listened, eyes widening slightly. He stood up and went down an aisle, running his finger along the spines of several books. He finds one, pulls it from the shelf and opens it. He heads back to the table and sets it down, turning it toward Sam. "This look about right?" When Sam nodded, Bobby sighed and leaned back in his seat.

Sam frowned and closed the book to look at the title. He looked up at Bobby. "No way."

Bobby shrugged. "You got any other possibility? One that makes sense?"

Sam shook his head. "No. I don't." He opened the book back up and started reading. "You got anything more at home?"

Bobby nodded. "Yeah. Better than that book." He sighed. "Probably more accurate too."

Sam nodded and glanced up at Bobby. "Think we should tell Dean?" He looked back down at the book.

Bobby was silent for a moment before looking at Sam. "Yeah, probably should, but you know him best. Will he listen?"

Sam shrugged as he continued reading. "I don't know, Bobby. He really loves Loki. If Loki has been lying to him all along, it might kill Dean." He looked up. "If we can get something concrete from your books, I'll take it to the source."

Bobby nodded. "Fair enough." He didn't look like he agreed. He motioned for Sam to finish up. "Come on, we best get back to Dean. Or call him anyway. Find out if it's safe to go back to the motel." He grumbles.

Sam couldn't stop the grin before it spread. "We only have one room, Bobby. He wasn't expecting Loki to show up. If we get back there and he's not there, then he doesn't want to be disturbed. Took me several times to get that straight." He stood up and collected the books, putting them on a cart to be replaced on the shelves.

The two of them headed back to the motel, finding Dean still there and no sign of Loki. Dean looked up when they walked in and stuffed something in his bag. "I was wondering where you two went to. Was about to call." He shrugged. "So, Loki promised me he'd knock off the pranks around here and he'll leave us out of them from now on." He looked over at Sam and Bobby. "That being said, there's no reason to stick around here anymore." He pointed at Sam's bed. "Laptop. Impala's tires are aired up. We're good to go."

Sam frowned a little, but packed up his laptop and grabbed his bag. "You think he can go against his nature?"

Dean nodded. "Yeah, I do." He looked at Sam after slinging his bag over his shoulder. "Just don't ask."

Sam started to grin when the light clicked on. He shook his head and chuckled. "I won't. Believe me, I won't." He picked up his bag.

Bobby rolled his eyes. "Will you two idjits just get a move on?" He headed outside.


	5. Chapter 5

2008

Gabriel knew Dean was in trouble. He'd been off doing his own thing when he felt the gut wrenching pain from Dean. He finished what he could quickly, leaving the prank on autopilot. He flew to Dean's side, though confusion hit. Dean should have been here. He looked around and his heart ached. Sam was dead. He moved to Sam's side and took the hunter's hand. He was about to call the soul back when Sam sat up, gasping for breath.

Gabriel was so stunned that he actually fell backward with a squawk. Sam turned to look at Gabriel. "What..."

Gabriel shrugged. "I don't know. I didn't do anything." He frowned. "What happened?"

Sam shook his head. "I don't know."

They both looked over as Dean came in. He only saw Sam and went to his brother's side. He didn't hear the horrified gasp from Gabriel, though he felt himself wrenched away from Sam in order to face Gabriel. "We need to talk, Dean-o."

"Later." Dean turned back to Sam. He frowned as he was jerked back to face Gabriel.

"Oh, no, bucko. Now!" Gabriel didn't give Dean the choice and Dean didn't argue. He looked at Sam. "We'll be right back." He kept hold of Dean and snapped them out of there. Only then did he unleash. "What the hell were you thinking?"

"I was thinking about saving Sammy, Loki. You know, taking care of family." Dean frowned. "And it's not really your business. You were too busy to help me find him."

Gabriel groaned and sat down. "Dean, you are my family. So is Sam." He looked up at Dean, then sighed in resignation. "So you made a deal with a demon. How long?"

"A year." Dean's voice was barely audible so he cleared his throat and repeated it.

"I can't save you, Dean. I can't undo what's been done." Gabriel turned away from Dean, tears threatening to spill out. "I could have saved Sam, but with this, you just made sure we both lose you. You can't come back to me, Dean. Not after this."

Dean was silent for a few moments before speaking again, starting to reach out for Gabriel, but stopping halfway there. "I'm sorry, Loki." He'd later deny that his voice cracked.

Gabriel refused to look back at Dean. "So am I." He snapped and sent Dean back to Sam. "So am I." He repeated, then let the tears flow. Why did he find his bondmate only to lose him again, permanently. He screamed his rage and anguish toward the sky and at his Father specifically. He'd make it easier on himself. Get used to the emptiness and heartache again. He ignored Dean's pleas for help, even though it killed a part of him each time.

Gabriel avoided them until the day he ran across the brothers in Broward County. Oh, he was so tempted. He'd already dropped one guy in a wormhole. He wasn't quite ready to leave town with the Mystery Spot there. He wanted to have a little more fun. He just didn't want Dean to realize he was there since he had promised to leave them out of his pranks. He couldn't target Dean directly. Dean knew his personal touch only too well. Sam, however, didn't.

So, Gabriel decided to play with Sam. Endless tuesdays. Dean dying in every possible way. Gabriel refused to watch that, instead leaving the prank to determine what all would occur to Dean. It was going so well until he slipped up. Later he would wonder if he wanted to be discovered. Damn the strawberry syrup.

Sam had followed him and trapped him with a stake against his neck. Gabriel didn't want to let go of the masquerade, but Sam was becoming insistent and Dean was becoming concerned about Sam's sanity. Gabriel dropped the mask with a sigh. Both Sam and Dean flinched. Sam moved the stake and stood back.

Dean closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. He shook his head, then opened his eyes and swung. He was glad that Gabriel knew well enough to roll with it or he'd have broken his hand.

Gabriel straightened back up and looked at Dean. "Dean..."

Dean pointed a finger at Gabriel. "No. You don't talk to me. Not again. Not after this." He turned and walked off, leaving Sam to deal with the trickster.

Sam frowned as he watched Dean walk off. He couldn't look at Gabriel. "Why?"

Gabriel was silent for a moment before speaking softly. "Because you need to be able to survive without him, Sam. I won't, so I won't be able to help you through it. Obviously this wasn't the best laid plan I've ever had."

Sam scoffed and turned to look at Gabriel . "You think?" He sighed and leaned up against the chain link fence next to Gabriel.

"Hey, I'm impulsive." Gabriel frowned at Sam. "I'll admit that Dean sometimes makes me a little stupid too. Hazards of getting too close to humans." Gabriel rolled his eyes and looked away.

Sam actually smiled a bit as he looked back at Gabriel. "Loki, you need to talk to Dean. He's miserable without you. You're miserable without him. I can tell."

Gabriel frowned as he looked up at Sam. "Wait, so Dean punches me, probably bruising his hand in the process. You tell me to go buddy up to him and seemed to have just forgiven everything I just did? And you know nothing about me. I'm not miserable. I'm perfectly happy."

Sam shook his head. "Didn't say that. In fact, right now, I still want to kill you." He looked down at the stake, then slid it back into his jacket. "I won't, though, because I don't know what it would do to Dean. And no, you're not happy. You've also been avoiding Dean since you took him off that last time. I assume that's when you found out what he did for me."

Gabriel studied the ground next to his feet before speaking. "I can't, Sam. It's already hard enough knowing he's going to die soon and I can't do a damned thing to stop it." He closed his eyes and took a slow breath in. "And yeah, that's when I found out. It's just easier for me if I stay away."

Sam stayed quiet, stuffing his hands in his pockets, looking off in the direction Dean had gone. He listened as Gabriel continued on. "I wish I could go back, Sam. I really do. I've lost him in the past but he's always come back. This time he won't. He can't." Sam looked at Gabriel at that.

"Wait, what? You've lost him before?" Sam's brows creased in confusion.

A look of panic and shock flitted across Gabriel's features before he shook it off. He shrugged, glancing at Sam out of the corner of his eye, trying to judge if Sam had seen it. He really couldn't tell. Snark or honesty. This was Sam. Sam had already seen his gentler side. Okay, snark wouldn't be appreciated right now. That left honesty. "He's got an old soul. I've met him before."

Sam watched Gabriel closely for a moment. "Okay." He shook his head and sighed. "You really should go apologize. I know I can't make you do it, but it would mean a lot to Dean."

Gabriel flinched, not caring if Sam noticed that reaction. "Why? I'll only lose him, so why does it matter, Sam?"

Sam turned away with a shrug. "Because I'm going to find a way to get him back, Loki. With or without your help, and if you don't apologize to him now, he may refuse to see you later."

Gabriel watched Sam walk away. He sighed and snapped his fingers. Tuesday became Wednesday. He didn't watch as Dean was shot, but he did keep an eye on Sam afterward.

Sam caught up with Gabriel and begged to be let go from the prank. Gabriel sighed and agreed after a brief argument about Sam needing to let Dean go. Once Gabriel had returned Sam to that Wednesday, Sam and Dean skipped town immediately.

Dean spent the next month cursing at Gabriel, trying to get his trickster to show up. He shifted to begging near the end. It wasn't until Lilith came for Dean that Gabriel would come back. On that day, Gabriel responded, unable to do anything else, his grace screaming at him to help his bondmate. He was too late. Dean's soul had been dragged to hell and Sam was the stunned survivor.

Sam looked up at Gabriel, tears streaming down his face. "Help him. Please."

Gabriel knelt next to Sam, placing his hand on Dean's cheek. "I can't."

Sam snapped, shoving Gabriel's hand away from Dean. "Can't or won't."

Gabriel looked up at Sam. "Can't, okay? He sold his soul! He made it to where I couldn't do a damned thing to help him!"

Sam shook his head. "You're a god damned angel, now do something!"

Gabriel stumbled backward, staring at Sam in shock. "Wha?"

Sam glared at Gabriel. "You both think I don't notice things, but I do. Sometimes after you leave, I find a feather behind. I did the research. They're angel feathers. You can rescue him. You can go into hell and bring him out."

Gabriel shook his head. "No, Sam, I can't. I'm an outcast, okay? I left home a long time ago. I can't go back." He reached out for Dean's body, tears in his eyes. He was stunned when Sam began screaming at him to get away and to never come back, telling him in great detail what he'd do if Gabriel ever came back. He sat back on his heels as a choked sob escaped him and the tears started to fall. He knew Sam heard and noticed. He also knew that Sam didn't care. He snapped himself away.

Gabriel stayed nearby, though didn't approach as Sam and Bobby laid Dean to rest. Bobby had looked up and saw Gabriel. He watched Bobby point him out to Sam and saw Sam's cold stare. He held the stare for a moment before looking away. He heard Bobby's approach.

"Dean loved you, you know." Bobby looked back toward Sam. "What I can't figure out is why Sam seems to hate you."

Gabriel shrugged and sighed. "I can't save Dean." He knew his voice was trembling. He also didn't care. "I can't save him." He looked across at Sam, then away again.

Bobby nodded and kept his attention on Gabriel. "Why not?"

Gabriel shook his head. "It's just not within my power."

Bobby glanced back at Sam, then looked back at Gabriel. "Dean once told me that you could have saved Sam, so why can't you save Dean?"

Gabriel closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Because he sold his soul, Bobby. I can't save him because he sold his soul. I will never be able to see him again. Ever." He opened his eyes and looked at Bobby for the first time.

Bobby flinched at the haunted look in Gabriel's eyes. He did the only thing he could do. He reached out and clasped his hand on Gabriel's shoulder. "Well, if you ever need anything..." He shrugged and pulled away.

"Thank you, Bobby." Gabriel waited until Bobby was out of earshot before softly adding, "but it won't matter soon." He turned toward Sam once more. The cold look had been replaced by one of hatred. He turned away, tears starting to fall. He walked away, stumbling as he went not bothering to snap himself away.

Bobby walked back to Sam and smacked him on the back of the head. "Idjit. He's hurting too. You lost your brother, well he lost his... well, his mate. You really gonna tell me he can't understand?" Bobby shook his head and walked off.

Sam stayed there for a while longer, just staring at the grave that held his brother. Eventually he walked away. He didn't see Gabriel's return. When Sam returned the following day, he paused when he saw Gabriel sitting there, leaning up against the wooden marker. He noticed the silver blade that Gabriel was holding. After a moment, he just walked up and ignored Gabriel.

Bobby, on the other hand, came back only once after two months. He wasn't surprised to see Gabriel. He sat down next to Gabriel and offered his flask. He said nothing as Gabriel took it and took a drink. He finally spoke. "Dean wouldn't want you to do this. He'd want you to live on."

Gabriel shook his head, holding his blade out, studying the way the light reflected off of it. "No. There's no point anymore." He held the blade out to Bobby. "It's one of the few ways I can die. Just do it."

Bobby looked at the blade, then shook his head slowly. "I can't. I promised Dean..."

Gabriel sighed and nodded. "Yeah, I kind of figured that." He pulled the blade back.

Bobby didn't look at Gabriel as he took a drink. "Why don't you do it yourself?"

Gabriel let out a bitter laugh. He looked up at the sky, not answering.

Bobby nodded to himself. "Yeah, thought so." He looked at Gabriel this time. "Who are you really?"

Gabriel turned his head to look at Bobby, eyes hard as stone. "First John, then Sam, now you? Where am I going wrong? Is it how I'm interacting with Dean?"

Bobby shook his head. "John knew?" He raised his brows in surprise. "He never mentioned it to me."

Gabriel looked away. "He figured it out before he was taken. He kept his promise. They never found out about me." He sighed.

Bobby nodded. "Did Dean know?"

Gabriel shook his head and looked at Bobby. "He's known me as Loki for so long it's habit."

Bobby sat silently beside Gabriel for a moment before speaking again. "So who are you?"

Gabriel looked at Bobby. "Oh, why the hell not." He shrugged a shoulder. "I'm an angel." He didn't quite trust Bobby with his name yet.

Bobby snorted, shook his head, and reached over, giving the back of Gabriel's head a smack. "I know that much, ya idjit. What I can't figure out is why you're hiding."

Gabriel blinked several times, processing the smack. He looked at Bobby for a long moment before sighing. "Sam. The feathers." He didn't even have to see Bobby's nod. "Gabriel."

Bobby's brows shot up in surprise. "As in the archangel?"

Gabriel nodded and looked back at his blade. "And I've lost my bondmate." He didn't bother trying to stop the trembling. "That is something no angel should have to suffer. It literally tears us apart."

Bobby watched Gabriel, glancing to the blade briefly. "So, you'd rather commit suicide than try and help Dean?" He shook his head, standing up, and looking down at Gabriel. "Maybe Sam was right about you. You're a coward. It's why you won't do it yourself."

Gabriel looked up at Bobby, barely keeping himself under control. He couldn't even speak as he watched Bobby walk away.

One month later, Gabriel felt the first seal break. He also heard the call for a rescue mission into Hell. He closed his eyes and a faint smile began to break through. He would stay here and wait for Dean to be saved and he had no doubt Dean would be saved. Sam may have shut him out, but he was not going to abandon Dean, not this time. He would keep an eye on the fight and, if absolutely necessary, he'd jump in to help. He wouldn't have to get involved. Little Castiel was doing splendidly. He winced when he felt Castiel's wings burning. He breathed a sigh of relief when Uriel came to the rescue, putting the fires out.

It took a month, but the minute Dean was grabbed by little Castiel and brought up, Gabriel leapt to his feet and let out a shout of triumph. The fallout from Dean's soul returning to his body, and his grace flaring up, pieced back together and healed, knocked Gabriel down as he was a little unsteady from not standing in so long. He felt Castiel's presence, but said nothing, not even when he heard the question of who he was. He ignored his brother. By the time a hand broke through the earth, Gabriel was back on his feet. He grasped the hand and helped Dean free.

Dean gasped for breath and clung to Gabriel. After a moment, he was able to get one word out. "Sam?"

Gabriel shrugged with a small frown. "As far as I know, he's fine." He should have expected this. Dean's first thoughts had always been for Sam. It would have been nice, though, to have Dean think of him first, just once, since he was the one that had sat by Dean's side for four months.

Dean frowned as he studied Gabriel's features. "You haven't stayed with him?"

Gabriel shook his head. "He threatened to stake me, then cut me up into tiny pieces, burn them, and scatter the ashes all over the globe if I ever showed back up. Of course, that was right after... you know. He wouldn't even let me mourn you, Dean. Not properly. He pushed me away. I haven't tried talking to him since."

Dean was silent for a long moment, then nodded. "Do you at least know where he is?"

Gabriel nodded. "Yep, sure do. He's not far from here actually. Stayed nearby so he could find a way to get you back." Gabriel noticed Dean turning pale. "And no, he didn't do anything. You were dragged out of hell. Literally."

Dean relaxed against Gabriel. "Thank God."

Gabriel shook his head. "Nah, He's left the building. Let's get you up and to see Sam." He stood up and helped Dean to his feet. "Come on."

Dean stumbled a bit, but finally found his legs and steadied himself. He leaned against Gabriel as the world shifted around them. When he looked around, he found the two of them outside a motel room.

Gabriel frowned as he looked at the door. "Sam isn't alone and I really don't like the feeling I'm getting here."

Dean was knocking on the door before Gabriel could stop him. When the door was opened, it wasn't Sam standing there, but a woman.

"Where's the...." She started the question before taking in both men. When her eyes landed on Gabriel, she flinched and moved back.

Gabriel narrowed his eyes at the woman. "Where is Sam?"

The woman was moved aside as Sam came to the door. He stopped cold when he saw Dean. Sam ignored Gabriel as he attempted to go on the attack. He found himself held back by Gabriel.

Dean jumped back when Sam lunged at him. "Woah, Sammy, it's me."

Gabriel kept himself between the brothers. "Sam, I'd know if it wasn't him. Please, trust me, it's Dean."

Sam looked down at Gabriel, then nodded. "I thought you couldn't do anything."

Gabriel shook his head. "I didn't."

Sam frowned. "Then who?"

Gabriel shrugged. "How would I know?" His tone was light, but his eyes pled with Sam not to push further.

A few days later saw Castiel's arrival, who claimed to have raised Dean from Hell. Dean had asked Gabriel about it, but Gabriel had shrugged and claimed not to know. Dean had pushed things and a rift began to form between them. Gabriel had disappeared for two weeks, then refused to be alone with Dean once he'd returned. He also refused every offer to meet Castiel.

Gabriel was trying to keep Sam and the demon, Ruby, separated, but that was not going to plan. Instead, Sam was falling further into the trap that Gabriel knew was set. He begged Sam to let go of the desire to kill Lilith.

The year was hard for everyone.


	6. Chapter 6

2009

Sam had killed Lilith. Gabriel's warnings went unheeded. In fact, Dean had gone off with Castiel instead of staying with him. It hurt. The bond between them was strained and was starting to fray. He had told Dean he didn't trust Castiel, but Dean didn't care. He went off with the angel instead. Yeah, he'd gotten better at keeping his identity secret from his bondmate, but he'd also avoided Castiel. He didn't want the younger angel to reveal who he truly was yet and Sam had promised not to say.

Gabriel felt it when Castiel was destroyed. He also felt it when Lucifer escaped the cage. He felt it when Dean was whisked away from danger. That surprised him. He hadn't done it. He knew Lucifer wouldn't have done it. He felt Castiel come back to life. That surprised him even more. Dad was alive and well and walking the Earth. Had to be. He knew it was time to come clean with Dean. He hoped the truth wouldn't kill them both.

After Castiel had saved Sam and Dean from Zachariah, Gabriel decided to show up. He waited until Castiel had left and Dean was alone. "We need to talk."

Dean looked over at his lover and nodded. "Yeah, we do. Why the hell didn't you help us?" He threw his change of clothes on the bed and sat down. "We needed you. I needed you."

Gabriel sighed and stared at the ground directly in front of his feet. "Dean, I'm not what you think I am."

Dean ran a hand over his face and nodded. "I know."

Gabriel looked up in surprise. "What? How?"

Dean shrugged and reached over, pulling a large plastic bag full of feathers from his bag. He tossed them to Gabriel. "They're yours. Loki never manifested wings." He smiled at Gabriel, reassuring him. "I've known for a while. Some nights, just before I'd fall asleep, you'd wrap me up in your wings. It helped to make me feel safe, Gabriel." He reached out a hand to a stunned Gabriel. "Yeah, I know that too. Cas once asked me where Gabriel was. I was confused. He explained that the name Gabriel was inscribed on my soul, meaning he was my bondmate. I put two and two together."

Gabriel moved over and took the offered hand, sitting next to Dean. "I'm sorry. I should have told you." He pauses, interlacing his fingers with Dean's. "And I should have come after you. I was just..." He shook his head, staring at the floor.

Dean turned slightly to better look at Gabriel, reaching out and cupping his cheek, coaxing eye contact out of Gabriel. "Look, it doesn't matter. You're you. No matter what you call yourself. You're who I fell in love with."

Gabriel looked away, staring toward the window. "Dean, you didn't have a choice. You never had a choice."

Dean frowned then and tugged on Gabriel's hand. "What?"

"I'm your bondmate, Dean. I have been for centuries." Gabriel closed his eyes, almost bracing for something negative.

"Huh." That's all Dean says. He leaned in against Gabriel.

Gabriel opened his eyes and looked at Dean in surprise. "That's all you have to say? I tell you that fate put us together and you had no choice and you have nothing else to say?"

Dean shrugged. "What do you want me to say? That I'm pissed? Accuse you of setting all this up? Wondering why you couldn't stay away?" He shook his head. "Loki, Gabriel, whichever you want me to call you, I love you. You are everything I have ever wanted in life."

Gabriel sighed and leaned up against Dean. "I belong to you, Dean. All I want to do is to bring you happiness and contentment. Ever since I first found you, I've been yours."

Dean chuckled wrapped his arms around Gabriel, resting his cheek against soft hair. "I guess that answers whether or not reincarnation happens."

Gabriel snorted and shook his head in amusement. "Actually, it's the exception to the rule. Every angel has a bondmate in a human soul. Finding that soul isn't easy. Dad manipulated things so I would find you without seeing you directly, I guess. Since I'm down here on Earth, your soul finds its way back to me. Most angels have already found their bondmates. Only a small few haven't."

Dean nodded slightly. "Oh. So I get no eternal rest as long as you're here?" He meant it to be a joke, but the look in Gabriel's eyes causes him to shake his head. "No, it was a joke. I didn't mean it like that." He sighed.

Gabriel looked away, then nodded. "I know how you meant it, but yeah, it's true. As long as I'm here, your soul will always come back to me." He glanced toward the door. "Sam is on his way back, but Dean, I need to tell you that Sam has the mark of a bondmate on his own soul. It's unclaimed. He hasn't met his angel yet."

Dean raised both brows in surprise. "Really? Could it be Cas?"

Gabriel shook his head. "Sam has been around Castiel. Meeting your bondmate is something that's revealed instantly." He looked back at Dean. "I don't know for sure, but it's possible Lucifer's his bondmate."

Dean recoiled and shook his head. "No. No way."

Gabriel frowned at Dean, then sighed. "Look, I don't like the possibility any more than you do, but damn it all, Dean, it's possible. If Luci's his bondmate, then they have to meet."

Dean hissed. "You're asking me to hand my brother over to the Devil?"

Gabriel shook his head. "No. I'm asking you to stop protecting him long enough for them to meet face to face. If Luci's Sam's bondmate, then he will know it immediately. The power Sam will hold over him will be astronomical."

Dean was silent for a moment before responding. "He'll do whatever it takes to make Sam happy."

Gabriel nodded. "Yeah. Whatever it takes. He'll know like I know. I know you. I know your soul. I've held you in many forms, Dean. I've made love to you through two other incarnations. But nothing compares to seeing your soul shine the way it does for me." He placed a hand against Dean's chest, right over his heart. "Nothing compares to it. I only have to think about an action and your soul responds. That's how I know what will make you happy."

Dean covered Gabriel's hand with his own, closing his eyes briefly. "See? This is why I love you and why I can't be mad at you." He started to lean in against Gabriel before realizing that Gabriel had moved Dean's bag from the bed and was laying them down on it.

Gabriel smiled softly as Dean nestled in his arms. By the time Sam got back, Dean was asleep. Sam smiled at Gabriel, honestly glad to see him back. Gabriel smiled back at Sam, though it didn't reach his eyes. Sam tilted his head, confused at the worry he saw. Gabriel shook his head and closed his eyes, relaxing and slipping into Dean's dream effortlessly.

After the brothers had gotten Bobby back home and settled, Dean left Sam with him and went off with Gabriel. He was pleased that Sam didn't complain since Sam had intruded on several private discussions between Dean and Gabriel.

Gabriel had taken them to a private island in the South Atlantic. Dean hadn't been to this particular safe house before. He looked around briefly before stopping to stare out the window at the narrow strip of beach nearby.

"Dean, I know we need to talk. There's so much I should tell you, but I don't know where to start." Gabriel leaned up against the wall, watching Dean for any reaction.

"Yeah. Maybe start at the beginning? I mean, how did we first meet?" Dean kept looking outside, not watching Gabriel.

Gabriel sighed and nodded. "You were fifteen. An acolyte. I saved you from a rather unruly mob that hated the thought of Christianity in Norway. You were named David then." He looked away from Dean. "I told you then who I was. I couldn't stop myself." He continued on, ignoring the snort from Dean. "Believe it or not, you had actually studied everything related to me. I was your patron saint at the time. When I told you my name, you fell to your knees."

Dean finally looked at Gabriel. "How long have we been lovers? From the start?"

Gabriel shook his head. "No, not from the start. When you were David, you wouldn't hear of it. The love you had for me was platonic, even though I did want more. You called me your angel-who-refused-to-be-an-angel many times. I would have given you anything, even then." He shrugged and looked at the ground. "I don't want you to freak out or anything, but you haven't always been male."

Dean raised a brow. "Oh? How many times have I been..."

"Female? Twice. Once as Meredith. The other as Ruth. It was during your time as Meredith that we became lovers. It wasn't back to back incarnations either. After Meredith, you were Daniel. You wouldn't touch me. It wasn't until you were Ruth that we were lovers again. This is the first time since then that I've been able to make love with you." He looked back at Dean. "It's not that I haven't wanted to. I have. You were just brought up every time to believe it was wrong. This was also the first time I kept an eye on you from the time you were a child. You really never did stand a chance against falling in love with me, Dean."

Dean watched Gabriel for a moment before nodding. "So what do you want me to call you? Loki or Gabriel? I mean, you are both of them, right?"

Gabriel nodded. "Yeah, I am. I think I prefer Loki. It sounds better coming from you than Gabriel does." He wrinkles his nose. "It's all you've really ever called me."

Dean moved over to Gabriel, slipping his arms around his lover. "Okay, Loki it is." He smiled and leaned in for a kiss.

Gabriel closed his eyes and returned the kiss eagerly. He gripped Dean's shirt tightly and wriggled closer to Dean.

Dean laughed at the wriggling Gabriel and tightened his hold. "Woah there, calm down. I don't think you can get much closer."

Gabriel grumbled and shook his head. "No, I can. Somehow, I can." He bit his lower lip, then looked up at Dean. "Dean, something else you need to know. Because I belong to you, to your soul, you'll be able to see me in my true form. It's why I brought you here. No one else is around. I want you to know me."

Dean smiled down at Gabriel. "Only if you're comfortable showing me. You shouldn't do anything you don't want to do."

Gabriel nodded and rested his head on Dean's shoulder, nuzzling against his neck. "I do want you to know me, Dean, but it is hard. I've spent a long time hiding. If I show you, the rest of the angels will know where I am and that I'm still alive. I'm not sure I want them to know that yet, but you're more important to me."

"Loki, I love you. No matter who you really are in there, I still love you." Dean kept one hand around Gabriel's waist, the other slipping up over his back to bury in his hair. "I don't really give a damn if I never had a choice. I don't want anyone else. I never have."

"Because you didn't have a choice. I took that away from you by being with you so early. I always let you grow up before this time. I was, I don't know, I just wanted to be loved by you again. It had been so long." Gabriel trembled in Dean's arms.

"Hey, baby, it's okay. I'm not mad at you. I'm really not. Please, relax." Dean rubbed Gabriel's back gently. "I already said I didn't care. You do everything to make me happy, though sometimes I wonder if you're really happy. Like right now."

Gabriel pulled back just a bit to look at Dean. "When you're happy, I'm happy." He shook his head. "Dean, when you're hurting, I'm hurting. The hardest thing I ever did was to not be with you through everything. I just..."

Dean leaned in and kissed Gabriel to shut him up. "Loki, I do understand. I might not have liked it back then, but now I understand." He smiled faintly, just a twitch at the corners of his mouth. "But I do want one thing."

Gabriel perked up a bit at that. "What? Anything? I'll do anything you want."

Dean chuckled and nodded. "Oh, I think you would. I want to see your wings. The feathers I've found are just a teaser. I want to see them."

Gabriel nodded and leaned in against Dean again. He relaxed and the air around his back shimmered. A second later, one set of tawny wings faded into view. They reached up a good six inches taller than Gabriel and went down to his ankles. He kept his face buried against Dean's neck. He gasped when he felt Dean's fingers stroke the feathers.

Dean smiled as he stroked the feathers into place. Some had gotten bent. A few torn. Several came loose just from being touched. He listened to the rapid breathing from Gabriel, realizing what this was doing to his mate.

Gabriel shivered when Dean stroked his fingers through the feathers to straighten them out. He didn't complain when Dean let him go and led him through the safe house to a large bathroom. He didn't hesitate when Dean pointed for him to sit on the edge of the tub.

Dean took his clothes off and climbed into the tub. When Gabriel got the idea, he snapped his fingers and his clothes joined Dean's. He turned on the water and let it warm up. When it was the right temperature, he began to wash Gabriel's wings.

Gabriel closed his eyes and relaxed into the touch. He couldn't stop the soft moan that broke free. He kept his wings as still as possible for Dean to work on grooming them. He helped by stretching them only when Dean pulled on them to open them out a little.

When Dean finished and climbed out of the tub, he grabbed a towel to dry off. He smiled at Gabriel, who was still blissed out from the wing grooming and watching him with devotion. He dropped the towel and pulled Gabriel to his feet. He leaned in and kissed Gabriel, pulling him in.

Gabriel wiggled his way closer, gasping into the kiss with the sensations of their erections rubbing together. His wings trembled and the remaining water was flicked off. He pushed against Dean, making him walk backward. He smiled into the kiss at how much Dean trusted him to allow himself to be led this way.

The backs of Dean's legs bumped up against a bed. He was pushed down on it and he scooted back as Gabriel climbed on, crawling up after him. He grinned at how the wings made Gabriel look predatorial, then it occurred to him that he was the prey. His tongue darted out to lick at his lower lip as he watched Gabriel's approach.

Gabriel stretched out on top of Dean, his wings unfolding just enough to take some of his weight, effectively trapping Dean underneath him. He reached over to a bedside table and found a bottle of lube in the top drawer. He put it in Dean's hand as he began to bite at Dean's neck.

Dean growled a little at the bites and jerked upward. He put the lube aside and reached down to grab at Gabriel's thighs, pulling them to either side of his own hips. He nudged Gabriel forward a bit, smiling as he did as asked. He returned the bites on Gabriel's neck as he opened the lube and coated his fingers. It had been a while, so he started with one finger. It wasn't long before Gabriel was pushing back, panting softly. He went to two, then quickly moved on to three. Once Gabriel was whimpering and trembling above him, he removed his fingers.

Gabriel grabbed the lube and drizzled some over Dean's cock. He stroked him several times before positioning himself and sliding down, head thrown back in pleasure. He felt Dean's hands grip his hips tightly. He started to move then, lifting up, then dropping back down. Those hands on his hips moved with him, pulling him down harder. Gabriel knew that Dean loved to hear the gasps that were torn from him when he was being rammed into like this.

Dean knew he wouldn't last. He moved one hand to Gabriel's cock, stroking him in time. He wanted, no, needed, for Gabriel to come first. His eyes met Gabriel's seconds before Gabriel cried out as he spilled out over Dean's hand. He lost control of his grace and Gabriel came to the front, shining and glorious. Dean couldn't hold back under both Gabriel's orgasm and Gabriel's grace. He came harder than he could remember, screaming out both names before everything went dark.

When Dean came to, he was being blanketed by a tawny wing and strong arms were holding him gently. He blinked several times before looking at Gabriel. "How come that never happened before?" He managed to whisper.

Gabriel shrugged a shoulder. "Probably because I kept telling myself you didn't know. Now that I know you know, I think I just thought I didn't have to be so careful. I could really let go."

Dean smiled and caressed the wing over him. "Makes sense. I thought you didn't want to do that though?"

Gabriel shrugged again. "Well, I kind of lost control." He looked away, flushing a little.

Dean chuckled and tugged on a few feathers, making Gabriel look back at him. "That's a good thing. I like the fact that I can make you lose control."

Gabriel whimpered at the tugging. "I'll remember that." He flicked his wing. "Don't do that." He looked like he was about to say more, but tucked his head against Dean's neck instead.

"Why not?" Dean was grinning at the reaction he was getting.

Gabriel groaned as the tugging intensified. "Dean, that is a highly sensitive spot on any angel, but for one who is bound like I am, it's..." He tensed at another tug, then moaned against Dean's neck. "Dean... Dean, please. Not right now."

Dean sighed and stopped tugging. "Okay, baby, but next time..." He smoothed the feathers back in place.

Gabriel sighed in both relief and emptiness. "Thank you. Next time, you can do whatever you damned well want." He smiled. "Right now, you need to sleep. Don't think I haven't noticed how little rest you've been getting."

Dean groaned, but relaxed against Gabriel. "Loki, you are a menace, you know that?"

Gabriel laughed and nodded. "I know." He turned his head and moved so he was using Dean's chest as a pillow. He didn't have to sleep, but he closed his eyes anyway.

Dean let his mind drift back to all the times he'd been laying like this with Gabriel in the past. Each time, he'd felt the same softness. It was always the wings. He slipped into sleep with those wings being the last thing he thought about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't write sex a lot cause I don't think I do well at it. I just felt like doing it on this one. Hope you all enjoy it. There's still more to come. 2009 isn't finished yet. If there's any specific situations anyone would like to see, feel free to suggest it.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't forgotten about this story. I've just been busy. 
> 
> I didn't expect this chapter to happen, but it was nagging at me about how Michael would react upon finding that his true vessel was Gabriel's bondmate. It's short, but also takes a closer look at the relationship between Michael and Gabriel.

Michael felt when Gabriel lit up like a flare. He went to investigate, staying invisible, though elated to have felt the presence of his little brother again. Maybe now he could feel it was okay to laugh again rather than feeling guilty when he did. He'd suspected that Gabriel had hidden as a Trickster, but couldn't find him. It had fit his personality so well, even then. Gabriel had always managed to make them laugh, even when he and Lucifer had been fighting. He had felt so guilty that Gabriel had left. He'd gone to Earth to try and find Gabriel, but his baby brother had already gone under the radar. Upon seeing his little brother and his true vessel in bed, curled around each other, his elation disappeared and he gritted his teeth. He watched them for a moment, then saw the threads of the bond. He yanked as hard as he could on the bond between the two, trying to break it. He snarled as it stayed solid. He knew it was childish to do so, but he just didn't care. He flew off after letting go of the bond.

Gabriel shot upright at the feel of the pull and growled, wings flaring out defensively. In addition to the one pair that was showing, his remaining two faded into view as he narrowed his eyes.

Dean blinked awake at Gabriel's sudden movement and lifted up on his elbows. "What is it?" He frowned at the sight of the six wings and scanned the room. "There's nothing here, Loki." He lay back down and pulled at Gabriel's arm to get him to act as blanket again.

"Michael's been here." Gabriel hissed. "He knows I'm back and he knows we're bound." Gabriel didn't lay back down, but he did move to where he was sitting against the wall. He pulled Dean up against him and stared combing his fingers through Dean's short hair.

"I'm guessing that's not a good thing?" Dean frowned, but let himself be moved. He rested his head on Gabriel's lap, looking up at him.

Gabriel shrugged. "I'll talk to him later. Right now, he's throwing a fit." He let one pair of wings cover Dean, the other two staying ready in case of danger.

"Why?" Dean tried to stifle a yawn.

"We used to be close. I'm sure he was upset when I left home." He moved his hand to Dean's back, rubbing gently to relax his human. So what if he sent a little sleep mojo out. He smiled faintly when he felt the tension leave Dean's shoulders and sensed the beginnings of a dream starting. He kept himself out of the dream just in case.

The following week, Gabriel left Dean with Sam and Bobby in order to go seek out Michael. Upon arriving in Heaven, he found himself at odds with several angels playing bodyguard for the archangel. Gabriel found himself growing upset at the younger angels refusal to let him pass and snapped them away before things could turn violent. He walked through the door.

Michael looked up as Gabriel stalked into the room. "Gabriel." The one word was monotone and carefully guarded in tone.  
"What the hell were you doing, Michael?" Gabriel snarled. "You know better than to touch a bond like that!"

Michael stood, towering over Gabriel. "Dean Winchester is mine, Gabriel! My vessel! I don't know what you're playing at, but you will stand down and break the bond between you! Now!"

Gabriel took one step backward, the instinct of deferring to his older brother taking control. He shook it off when he thought about his bondmate and drew himself up as tall as he could and unleashed on Michael, throwing his older brother back several yards. "I'm his bondmate, you ass! Or did you miss that little fact when you tried to break our bond yourself?"

Michael skidded to a stop, staring at Gabriel in shock before glancing toward the door. He frowned as no one came in, then looked toward Gabriel.

"Oh, them? They're in the middle of a bad Japanese game show right about now." Gabriel smirked. "I could send you there too, if you want. Might do you good to meet the nutcracker."

Michael seemed too stunned to respond for a long moment before he finally managed to make sounds again. "Bondmate?"

Gabriel nodded as he stood down, though stayed somewhat defensive. "Yeah. Bondmate. You take him, you destroy me. You really willing to do that, Mikey?" He shot his brother a forlorn look. "I know you were willing to throw Luci into the cage, and now, kill him if it comes to it, but are you really willing to kill me? If Dad is still around, you know he'll flip over that. He made each of us a human soul to match us perfectly. You know that once we find that soul, destroying it will destroy us. Please, don't do that to me. Don't take Dean away from me." He held out a hand toward Michael. "Please? Mikey? Glow-worm?" Michael just turned and started to walk away, wincing as Gabriel called him the nickname that had disappeared from his life as Gabriel had. It had come about because of his constant meddling with their Father's creations in order to make some worms glow so he could use them as a night light for Gabriel when he was just a fledgeling.

Gabriel dropped his hand and took a shuddering breath. "Okay. Just so you know, Dean, Sam, and myself are going after Luci in a few weeks." Gabriel left before Michael could turn back around, so he didn't hear Michael's soft 'be careful.... Flip-flop'. 

Michael smiled faintly at the memory of Gabriel's first few failed attempts at flying and, once he got the hang of it, the immediate subsequent flipping from clouds and belly flops into the oceans that earned him the nickname of 'flip-flop'. It hadn't been him that gave him that nickname either. That had been Lucifer. Michael dissolved into tears as he sank down to the floor, unsure of what to do. He begged his Father to return and take the decision away from him. There was, of course, no answer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't blame me for the nicknames. They wrote themselves.
> 
> Feedback warms the writers soul. And gets them motivated for quicker updates. :)


	8. Chapter 8

Two months later, the brothers and Gabriel were in Carthage, trying to catch Lucifer off guard. Castiel had joined them and been waylaid by Lucifer after being distracted by the reapers. Gabriel had barely managed to keep Sam and Dean from becoming puppy chow after Meg had unleashed hellhounds on the brothers. They stayed holed up in a hardware store briefly while Gabriel was searching for Castiel in the town. When Gabriel returned empty handed letting them know that Castiel was safe and out of the town, they began to devise a plan for their own escape. They set up a bomb on a timer. Sam and Dean slipped out the back while Gabriel opened the doors. Once the hellhounds were in the store, he tripped the timer and flew to join the brothers.

They found Lucifer on a hilltop, shovel in hand. "Stop sneaking around, Flip-flop." Lucifer smirked, not turning to look around.

"You got me." Gabriel motioned for Sam and Dean to stay back as he walked out into the open.

Dean couldn't help but look at Sam and mouth 'flip-flop?'. Sam shrugged and shook his head.

Lucifer glanced toward Gabriel. "I must admit, I'm surprised to see you here. When you didn't come back, I thought..." He looked away, back down at the hole he was digging.

Gabriel kept his distance, leaning up against a tree. "Yeah, well, you know why I left."

Lucifer stuck the shovel into the ground. "No, Gabriel, I don't. Enlighten me."

Gabriel sighed and looked toward the place where Sam and Dean were still hiding. "You and Mikey wouldn't let up, Blue." He looked down at his hands. "You had both cornered me, you know. You wanted me on your side. Mikey wanted me on his. He had already talked Raphael into following him. He wanted me too."

Lucifer looked at Gabriel for a long moment. "They're here, aren't they." He turned to survey the area. "But they're hiding."

Gabriel pushed away from the tree. "Damn it, Luci, you can stop this here and now." He moved toward Lucifer, hands outstretched. "Dad never wanted us to fight like this. You know that."

Lucifer stopped looking around and turned his attention back to Gabriel. "Dad didn't want this? Really?" His eyes flashed in anger. "Then why did He tell Michael to cast me out?" He hissed toward Gabriel. "Where is He anyway? I'd like to ask him that myself."

Gabriel flinched, taking a step backward. "I... I don't know, Blue."

Lucifer lost control. "Don't call me that!" He raged at Gabriel.

"Why not? Blue? You called me Flip-flop." Gabriel folded his arms across his chest. Yeah, it was a little petty on his part, but he'd barely gotten Dean to stay back and give him a chance to try first.

It took Lucifer a moment to calm down. "Because I gave you your nickname, Gabriel. He gave me mine."

"Lu, I'm sorry." Gabriel reached out again. He was unprepared when Lucifer lashed out. He was thrown back, landing against a tree, the breath knocked out of him.

Dean came out of hiding then, running toward Gabriel. He didn't pay any attention to Lucifer. All he knew was that Gabriel may be hurt. He heard Sam follow behind.

"Sam, Dean, how nice of you..." The hunters found themselves unable to move. Lucifer turned to look at them. His eyes met Sam's and he fell silent for a moment before continuing. "To join me." He tried to look away from Sam. He really tried hard. He couldn't. It hadn't been like this in Sam's dreams. There had been no pull. He hadn't really been there with Sam. Now, he felt trapped. The near panic he felt began to show the longer he stared at Sam.

Gabriel looked toward Dean, standing and brushing dirt from his jacket. "Bondmate." He whispered. He heard Dean's groan of dismay. "It's a good thing, Dean."

Sam tried to move, his terror growing the longer Lucifer stared at him. He fell backward as the invisible hold let go.

Gabriel flickered his eyes toward Sam. "He will do anything you ask, Sam."

Sam frowned, though not looking away from Lucifer. "Anything?"

Gabriel nodded. "He is to you what I am to Dean."

Sam tore his gaze away from Lucifer then to look in shock at Gabriel. "Seriously?" He looked back at Lucifer after the nod from Gabriel.

Lucifer kept his distance, torn between staying or fleeing. He could feel the pull from the soul staring at him. He tried to take a step backward, but his foot moved him a step forward.

Sam backed up reflexively. He glanced at Gabriel and Dean, then back at Lucifer. "Let them go?" He tried to put force behind his words, but they came out weak and questioning.

Lucifer didn't make another move, but his gaze flickered toward Dean and Gabriel. He nodded to Sam. "Done."

Sam looked back toward his brother. "Go. I'll be okay."

Dean started to protest, but nodded instead. "Be careful, Sammy." He didn't hear his brother's scoff as Gabriel whisked them away.

Sam turned back to Lucifer. "Loki says you're to me what he is to Dean."

Lucifer attempted another step backward, but ended up moving toward Sam again. He took a deep breath, then nodded. "Gabriel is Dean's bondmate. I, it would seem, am yours." He didn't sound happy about it, but he also didn't grumble the way he would have liked.

Sam stood his ground this time. "Gabriel, then. He tried to explain things to me. He said that he couldn't do anything that would hurt Dean."

Lucifer nodded, trying to appear bored, but unable to stop staring at Sam. "Something like that. They're also lovers. It could be that way with us." He flinches suddenly. "Or not." He sighed and finally managed to look away. "I'll go. It's what you want right now anyway."

Sam started to say something, but Lucifer was gone. He saw the look of despair just prior to his leaving. He sighed and shook his head. When he turned to walk away, he nearly ran into Castiel.

The angel looked surprised and hopeful. "Lucifer, of all angels, is your bondmate?"

Sam nodded. "Yeah, only I'm not sure what to do with that." He started to walk away.

Castiel moved to walk next to Sam. "This is a good thing, Sam. For Lucifer to do anything that would cause you any harm, he would only cause himself extreme anguish. Too much of that would cause permanent damage to his grace."

Sam slowed, then stopped. "Wait, I have that much power over him?" He turned to look at the angel.

Castiel stopped when Sam did. "Yes. Though I must warn you, keeping him away from you will only harm you both. The bond must be completed."

Sam shook his head. "No way. I am not letting him touch me."

Castiel tilted his head and squinted at Sam before he understood. "Sam, sex is not required for the bond. What Gabriel and Dean have done is followed the natural path of mates here on Earth, but it is by no means required. Lucifer will desire to be near to you so he may anticipate your wants and needs and provide them."

Sam sighed and nodded. "So, basically I should let the devil in."

Castiel nodded once. "Yes, Sam, you should. It is our best chance to stop events. Lucifer will cease acting toward the Apocalypse if you ask him to do so. If you ignore him, he will likely continue, though keep you alive and what he feels is safe. I wouldn't put it past him to lock you up somewhere, guarded by demons. He may even use Dean against you, Sam. Of course, to do that, he would, in all probability, enslave Gabriel to control Dean. "

Sam frowned and shook his head. "Why? He'd have to know that wouldn't make me the slightest bit happy. It'd make me miserable."

Castiel sighed. "And I stated that causing you pain would damage his grace. At first, it would pain him to take those actions to keep you safe. After a time, he just wouldn't care. His grace is injured already from his being cast down and then locked away. It wouldn't take much for him to completely lose his way. You can set him back on the right path, Sam. Only you can."

Once Castiel fell silent, Sam started walking again. He stopped when he heard Castiel following him. "I need to be alone right now, Cas."

Castiel nodded to Sam. "I understand. Call for me if you need."

Sam sighed and nodded his thanks before wandering away. He found a bench and sat down, stretching his legs out in front of him. He pulled out a silver knife and began to toy with it. He wondered if it wouldn't be so bad to have Lucifer around. Maybe he could even figure out a way to save the fallen angel. He made up his mind.

Before Sam could speak, Lucifer was beside him on the bench. "Sam?" His voice was hesitant, dejected, yet hopeful.

Sam jumped and nearly stabbed Lucifer in reaction. He calmed himself down and nodded at the unspoken apology in Lucifer's eyes. "Don't do that. Just wait until I actually call you or something."

Lucifer nodded, then stared at the ground. The same dejected, yet hopeful tone colored his words. "Does this mean you will call me again? Or is this just an 'I really wish you'd just disappear for good' call."

Sam sighed. "Honestly, I don't feel comfortable with all this. I thought I was your true vessel. Now I find out I'm your bondmate."

Lucifer interrupts him with a soft tone. "You aren't. I'm yours. I don't want to hurt you, and I will do everything possible to avoid that, but you could destroy me, Sam."

Sam fell silent for several minutes. He just stared at Lucifer. The fallen angel was hunched over, hands shoved in jeans pockets, not looking at Sam. The first word that came to Sam's mind was 'vulnerable', the second was 'terrified'. Sam didn't speak. He just reached out and pulled one hand from Lucifer's pocket and intertwined their fingers together.

Lucifer began to tremble. He looked down at their hands in confusion. He flexed his fingers, almost as if testing out how it felt to hold someone's hand. "I don't know how, Sam."

"Then do what the rest of us do. Pray." Sam squeezed the fallen angel's hand briefly. He let a smile start to show when Lucifer nodded.

Lucifer closed his eyes and began to pray for the first time in millennia.

\------------------------------

Dean paced the motel room, ignoring Gabriel's pleas for him to calm down and relax. "How?" It was the first he'd spoken since they arrived. "Sam is out there with the devil and I can't help him."

Gabriel sighed and stood in Dean's path, looking up at him. He reached out and ran his hands over Dean's forearms lightly. "Do you honestly think I'd have left if Sam were in danger? This is the best thing that could have ever happened. Lucifer won't hurt Sam. He won't. It's like I can't hurt you without paying a big price, Dean. I've paid it in the past and I won't do it again. I won't hurt you again." He pauses, then shrugged. "Well, not unless you want me to." He waggled his brows suggestively and slid his arms over Dean's shoulders, linking his fingers behind Dean's neck, while grinning up at Dean.

Dean couldn't stop the smile. He finally shook his head and leaned in to kiss Gabriel. "Okay, okay. I trust you to know if Sammy's okay. But, dude, I gotta ask. Flip-flop?"

Gabriel chuckled and looked down. "Right after Lucifer taught me to fly, I kinda liked flipping off of clouds and belly flopping into the ocean." He shrugged. "He called me Flip-flop once and, well, it stuck."

Dean couldn't help the laugh. "I believe it." He shook his head. "So, Blue?"

Gabriel sighed and closed his eyes. "Lucifer's favorite color. He turned himself blue once just to see what it would look like. Mikey found him and called him Blue from then on." He looked up at Dean, sadness in his eyes. He rested his head against Dean's shoulder, pressing his face against Dean's neck. He closed his eyes and started to say something, but was stopped by the gasp that tore its way free.

"Baby?" Dean pulled back to look at Gabriel. He frowned at the glassy stare. "Loki?" He shook the smaller man by the shoulders. "Gabriel!" That got a reaction. Amber eyes focused on Dean.

"Lucifer..." He began, shock coloring his words and expression.


	9. Chapter 9

Sam had to close his eyes against the sudden brightness. He heard a laugh full of wonder and joy. It wasn't a voice he recognized, but somewhere, deep down, he did know it.

"Sam, open your eyes. I belong to you and you can look upon me without fear." The soft voice was accompanied by a gentle touch on his cheek.

Sam hesitantly cracked one eye open. When it didn't burst into flames, he opened both eyes, blinking against the light. Once his eyes focused and adjusted, he found himself staring at the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes upon. It took him a minute to find his voice. "Lucifer?" He breathed out in awe.

"Yes." The voice seemed to be coming from everywhere and nowhere. "Sam, He has forgiven me. He's even offered to forge me a new vessel or make Nick stronger. The choice is yours."

Sam thought about it for a moment before realizing that the only Lucifer he'd really known was in Nick's body, though the thought of Jess crossed his mind. He'd just made up his mind when Lucifer faded out and took Nick's form once more, kneeling on the ground in front of Sam. Sam slid from the bench and knelt next to Lucifer.

Lucifer looked at Sam with wide eyes full of wonder. "Sam..." He shook his head, just staring at his bondmate.

Sam reached out and braced himself against the sudden weight of Lucifer's vessel against him. Every protest he'd had about Lucifer was forgotten as he held the crying angel assuring him that things would be okay.

Lucifer believed Sam. He knew his Father was still alive and with that realization came the fact that it wasn't time for the world to end. He wasn't meant to fight Michael. He'd been released by the one soul that would save him. His true vessel. His savior. There was no way he'd ever leave Sam now. Even if Sam wanted him gone. He'd just have to make sure that never happened.

The two of them went back to the motel where Gabriel and Dean were. Gabriel practically launched himself from Dean's arms to Lucifer's. Sam and Dean watched the two archangels before leaving the motel room to give them a moment together.

Lucifer had to pry himself free and hold Gabriel at arm's length. He took one look at the tear streaked face, smiled fondly, and wiped the tears away. "It's going to be okay, Gabriel."

"I know." Gabriel sniffled. "I just want it to be how it used to be. It never will though. Mikey and Raph won't let it. You know that. They won't listen. Mikey's still wanting to use Dean, you know." He shook off Lucifer's hold and moved away.

"He won't. He can't!" Lucifer watched as Gabriel sat down. He went to sit on Sam's bed, leaning up against the wall.

Gabriel shrugged. "I only wish that were true. I talked to him, Lu. He didn't seem to really care that I'm Dean's bondmate. He just stared me down." He looked down. "It's you and me against them."

"And me." Castiel frowned as he looked around. "Where are Sam and Dean?"

The archangels looked up in surprise. Lucifer studied the seraph carefully. "You're still falling."

Gabriel snorted. "But he's got more sense than most of our brothers." He motioned toward the door. "They stepped out for a minute. Either they're out there or they're at a bar or diner somewhere."

Castiel looked out the window. "They're not there."

Lucifer stood up and walked over, looking out the window, hands resting on the window sill. He closed his eyes briefly, then pushed away from the window. "Damn it."

Gabriel looked over at his brothers. "Relax. They're fine."

Lucifer raised a brow. "The Impala is still there, Gabriel."

Gabriel fell silent as he looked at Lucifer. He stood up and calmly walked to the door, then opened it and walked out into the night. He looked around the parking lot, then sniffed. He turned to look at his brothers. "Cassie, check the bars. Blue, check the diners. I'm going to see if any of the God Squad has been around."

Lucifer and Castiel both nodded before flying off. Gabriel went back into the room to work some mojo. The two angels came back empty handed. Lucifer was shaking as he shook his head. Castiel frowned as he started to reach out to Lucifer, wanting to offer comfort, but not sure if he should.

Gabriel focused on the task at hand. After intoning some Enochian, the map of the area flared up and left several sigils in it's wake. One of them was Michael's. Lucifer's eyes met Gabriel's over the remnants of the map. 

Just as they were about to panic, Michael appeared in the room. He came in the form of a young John Winchester. He held his hands up. "I didn't take them."

Gabriel growled and was about to attack when Lucifer grabbed him from behind. "Gabriel, don't." Lucifer held tight, arms encircling Gabriel's chest, practically lifting him off the ground. He was having difficulting containing the thrashing that Gabriel was exhibiting.

Michael kept his hands up. "I swear. Gabriel, I did not take him. I know what it would do to you."

Lucifer's calm voice sounded. "Then who did?" His eyes locked on Michael's. Calm tone, panicked eyes.

Michael shook his head. "I'm not sure, but I think Raphael and Zachariah have somthing to do with this."

Lucifer's eyes narrowed at Michael. He didn't let go of Gabriel, though Michael flinched back. "Then find out. I can't find Sam. Until he is by my side, I will raise Hell on Earth. Do you understand me, brother?" He spit the last word out.

Michael stood there stunned for a moment. "I, uhh, well, damn it! Everyone but me? Really?"

Castiel spoke up. "If it makes you feel any better, me too."

Michael looked toward Castiel. "Not really." He disappeared with a rustle of feathers.

Lucifer finally let Gabriel go. "Dad damn it, Blue, did you really have to stop me?"

"If I hadn't, he'd probably have hurt you, which would have hurt Dean." Lucifer held his hands up. "But I'm sure I can get him back here if you want to go a round or two."

Gabriel appeared to consider it before shaking his head. "Not now, but if anything happens to Dean, I will kill him."

\-------------------

Dean opened his eyes and groaned. He rubbed at the back of his head, his hand coming away with specks of blood. He looked around, then pulled himself up and to his feet. "Sam?"

Sam grumbled as he sat up. "Dean? What happened?"

Dean shook his head slowly. "Not sure."

"You two mooks have to be kept safe." Zachariah sat in a chair, smiling at the brothers. "After all, we can't let you two just run around anymore. It's getting close to show time, boys."

Sam stood up and winced as he touched the back of his head. "Show time?"

Zachariah nodded. "The Apocalypse, boys. The Apocalypse. Lucifer and Michael have to have their showdown, and you two are going to make it happen."

Dean sighed and closed his eyes. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Why am I not surprised?" He sighed. "You do realize that once Lucifer and Gabriel find out you have us, you're toast. Right?"

Zachariah frowned, looking between the two brothers. "Oh, I don't think so. Michael's orders. He wants you, Dean. Once Lucifer realizes that Michael has his vessel, he'll take Sam."

Sam glared at Zachariah. "Why don't you just get him here and find out for yourself?" Bitchface 179 successful.

Zachariah leaned back. "No, but as soon as Dean says yes, I'll have Michael come around."

Dean looked at Sam just as Sam groaned and crumpled down, coughing blood. He looked back at Zachariah. "Stop. Just stop."

Zachariah turned a pleased look on Dean. "One little word."

"Damn it. Please stop. I'll do it." Dean's eyes teared up as he looked back at Sam.

Zachariah leaned forward. "Is that a yes."

"Yes, damn it. Yes." Dean couldn't stop the tear that fell. It wasn't just for Sam. It was also for Gabriel.

Zachariah smiled and called for Michael.


	10. Chapter 10

Michael arrived, still wearing John Winchester. "Zachariah? You called?" His gaze flickered to Dean and then to Sam, just a hint of relief flickering before he looked at Zachariah impassively.

Zachariah looked smug as he stood up. "Dean agreed."

Michael took in a deep breath and glanced toward Dean. "Well, this complicates things." He frowned as Sam coughed again, more blood hitting the floor. "Nice touch, but unnecessary." He waved a hand toward Sam.

Dean helped Sam to his feet. "Just... Just do it, okay? I said yes."

Michael stared at Dean for a long moment, then shook his head once. "No."

Zachariah stammered in indignation. "But he's your vessel. I don't..."

Michael stood up and had Zachariah against the wall faster than the brothers could register. "Gabriel is his bondmate, Zachariah. If I take Dean, I kill Gabriel." A look of sadness crossed his eyes. "Would you have me kill another of my brothers?"

Zachariah swallowed hard, then shook his head, completely stunned. "I didn't know."

Michael let Zachariah go as he nodded. "I know." He smiled and rested his hand on Zachariah's shoulder. "But that's no excuse."

Dean and Sam barely managed to close their eyes as Zachariah's grace burned. When they opened their eyes, only the mark of burnt wings remained. Michael was nowhere to be seen.

Sam pulled out his cell phone and dialed. He held the phone to his ear. "Cas? Yeah. We don't know where we are, actually. Umm. Well..." He tried to explain the room they were in. About halfway through the description, Gabriel arrived, Lucifer immediately behind him. Sam thanked Cas, not hearing his confusion about why, and hung up.

Gabriel took hold of Dean and left without sparing a glance for Sam or Lucifer.

Lucifer wasn't so quick to remove Sam. Instead, he was cautious in approaching. "Sam, are you okay?"

Sam watched Gabriel take Dean away. He looked at Lucifer and nodded. "Yeah. Dean said yes, but Michael wouldn't take him." He appeared confused. "I don't get it. He said doing that would kill Gabriel."

Lucifer nodded as he stood in front of Sam. He wanted to comfort Sam, but he didn't think Sam would allow it. "If Dean is burned out, meaning his soul is just gone, not having moved on, then Gabriel would have no other option but to attack Dean's killer. In this case, Michael. Michael would have no choice but to kill or be killed. Sam, Michael is the oldest of us. Gabriel, the youngest. Gabriel may have spent a lot of time here on Earth as a trickster, but he won't be able to use that against Michael. He'll be lost in a rage. His only chance would be to trick Michael. A direct attack would leave Gabriel dead."

Sam shuddered involuntarily. He looked at Lucifer for a long moment before speaking. "Michael killed Zachariah. He said something about not wanting to kill another brother. Is he still going to come after you?" A small spark of panic started to rise in him.

Lucifer shook his head and stepped inside Sam's personal space, resting his hand on Sam's cheek. "No. No, he won't. He can't, Sam. He can't. Not anymore. None of us wants to harm a bound angel. It's torture, for us or for the human soul. When humans were created, I wanted nothing to do with you. Nothing. I saw all of you as flawed and hopeless. When He told me that one of those humans would save me, I laughed at Him. I told Him he was mistaken. No human would ever touch my grace the way that He did." He shook his head again and let his hand slide down over Sam's neck, then to his arm and curled his fingers around Sam's. "I was wrong. You saved me."

Sam stayed quiet, though he looked down at Lucifer's hand when he touched his own. He looked back up at Lucifer, searching his eyes. Finally, he shook his head and pulled away. "I can't. I... I just can't. I'm sorry."

Lucifer stepped back and nodded. "I know." He held out a hand to Sam. "Just to get you out of here and back to the motel." He waited until Sam hesitantly took his hand. He flew both of them to the motel and dropped Sam off before leaving again. He ignored Sam's calls, not paying attention to the increasing worry in those calls.

\--------------------------

Castiel found Lucifer several days later. "Sam has been calling for you."

Lucifer shrugged. "I'm... aware." He turned to look at Castiel. "He doesn't want me around. I'm only giving him what he wants." He turned back to his task at hand. Cloud shaping. This one, he was trying to make it look like a dragon.

Castiel took a risk. He created a breeze that blew the cloud away. "Sam has been insistently calling for you. He's worried about you."

Lucifer sighed and turned to look at Castiel. "I'm the one with the direct line to his soul, little one." He smiled, though it didn't reach his eyes. "Don't presume to tell me what my bondmate is feeling."

Castiel frowned at Lucifer. "The bond is not yet complete. You can't be certain what he is feeling. If you would only..." He never saw the blow coming. It just hit him hard. He fell toward Earth, though before he could hit ground, Lucifer caught him.

Lucifer set Castiel down, glaring at him. "Let it be known, little brother, that the only reason I did not let you make a big crater on your way down is because you are right about one thing. The bond is not complete. Now, if you want to help, convince Sam that it has to be completed and the only way for that to happen is true intimacy."

Castiel stared impassively at Lucifer. "I have tried to tell him that myself. He does not seem to believe that two people can be intimate without sexual intercourse. He continues to refuse to accept that the bond can be created through a close friendship."

Lucifer snorted and let Castiel go. "If he doesn't accept it, then he's going to kill us both."

Castiel flew off, leaving Lucifer alone. He had every intention of returning to Sam, but instead, he went to Dean. He and Gabriel agreed to talk to Sam about the bond.

\---------------------------

Dean knocked on the door to Sam's room. When it opened, he stepped in. "How are you and Lucifer doing?" 

Sam sighed and closed the door behind Dean. "He won't answer me. I don't get it. I want him to come back so we can talk about this, but he's ignoring me."

Dean nodded. "Cas talked to him. Seems that Lucifer is throwing a temper tantrum." He shrugged. "One that has Sam written all over it."

Sam sat down and looked up at Dean. "Why?"

Dean shrugged. "All I know is that Cas wanted me and Gabriel to talk to you about the bonding process."

Sam shifted uncomfortably. "Dean, I don't need this."

Dean shook his head and sat down across from Sam. "Actually, you do. When Gabriel and I bonded, and I mean really bonded, we were still only friends. I wasn't me. Not really. Same soul, different body." He also started to look uncomfortable.

Gabriel decided to pop in and relieve the tension. "What Dean means to say, Sam, is that when I first found his soul and we bonded, he was not going to have any kind of sexual relationship with me. In fact, he loved me much the same way he loves you."

Dean smiled at Gabriel in relief and mouthed a quick 'thanks' toward him.

Sam frowned and shook his head. "But you two..."

Gabriel took a deep breath and let it out in a huff. "Sam, let me put it this way. You do not have to have sex with Lucifer, but you do need to accept him as a friend, at the very least. Let him in. Let him get to know you. Get to know him. If you don't..." He broke off and looked to Dean.

Sam looked between the two of them. "If I don't... what."

Dean looked down at the floor, then over at Sam. "It could kill both of you, Sammy."

Gabriel looked back at Sam. "Actually, it will likely kill you and drive him to insanity. You think his ideas for the Apocalypse were bad then? Imagine a two year old throwing a tantrum. Now give that two year old the powers of an archangel."

Sam sucked in a breath, then let it out slowly. He nodded. "Okay. I can handle getting to know him as a friend, I guess. But he won't come when I call him. It's like he's ignoring me."

Gabriel nodded. "Because the bond isn't complete, Sam. He can't feel deep down what you really want. Right now, you're both scared and it's clouding what he can feel from you. For him, he's scared you'll reject him completely. Don't know what it is on your end."

Sam listened in silence, then flopped back on the bed. "I don't know either. He just scares me. I was supposed to be his vessel and now I'm expected to buddy up? I swore I would never say yes to him. It's hard changing that fact now. If he would just talk to me rather than run away, it will probably change."

Gabriel looked toward Dean. "Stay with him. I'll be right back." He disappeared before waiting for an answer. When he reappeared, he was sitting on a cloud next to Lucifer. He glanced down. "Tidal wave?" He smirked.

Lucifer blinked and looked at Gabriel for a moment before shaking his head with a faint smile. "Last time you did that, you wiped out an entire species, Flip-flop. Dad was furious. As I recall, you spent almost two centuries having to shape some land for Him."

Gabriel nodded solemnly. "Yeah." He grinned suddenly. "But it was worth it. Those things had sharp teeth. Ouchie doesn't even begin to cover it." He shook his hand suddenly. "Dad never warned us of that."

Lucifer smiled fondly at his brother. "I remember. I was the reason you spent only two centuries rather than five." He reached over and ruffled Gabriel's hair. He chuckled at the indignant squawk before becoming serious. "Gabriel, since Sam probably won't consider it, would you help with my wings?"

Gabriel's brows rose high. He considered it for a moment. "I think he would, Blue. Besides, you haven't asked him. If you do, and he says no, then I'll help. Just explain that it takes a great deal of trust to allow someone else to touch your wings, much less groom them. Hell, it took me almost a millennia to trust Dean's soul with my wings. But then again, I was hiding."

Lucifer was silent for several minutes. "Okay. I'll ask him." He looked at Gabriel. "But he's going to say no. He doesn't trust me. He doesn't want me around."

Gabriel scooted closer to his brother, almost pressed against his side. "Lu, you're half right. He doesn't trust you right now, but if you show trust in him, he'll open up to you. That said, he does want you around. He wants to get to know you."

Lucifer looked at Gabriel with a frown. "Why would he?"

Gabriel sighed. "Because he misses you, even if he doesn't understand why." He shoves at Lucifer. "Now go to him." He smiled as Lucifer flew off.

Lucifer arrived in Sam's motel room. He waited for Dean to leave before looking at Sam. "Gabriel said I should ask you... Well..." He sighed. "I need help with my wings."

Sam blinked in surprise. "Umm, okay. What do you need me to do?"

Lucifer looked away from Sam as he shrugged, letting his wings stretch free. "They're itchy and, well, filthy." They were a deep muddy red color and all six were out.

Sam stared at the wings for a moment before nodding. "I don't know what to do."

Lucifer nodded, frowning a little. "I can ask someone else..."

"No!" Sam shouted, standing up as he did. He stepped forward, right hand outstretched. He smiled slightly at the look of surprise from Lucifer. "No, it's just that I'll need you to guide me. I want to do this for you."

Lucifer lifted his eyes to look at Sam, searching for something as he did. Finally, he nodded, then waved a hand toward the bed.

When Sam looked down, there were several towels, some steaming, as well as a bowl of water. He smiled slightly, then sat down on the bed, cross legged and leaning up against the wall.

Lucifer hesitated, then sat down in front of Sam, his back to him. "Sam, I need to tell you. To let you do this..." He shook his head. "What I'm trying to say is that I trust you."

Sam lifted one of the warm wet cloths and was about to start when lucifer declared his trust. "Thank you." His voice was soft. When he touched the feathers, it was even softer. "They are so beautiful." He began to wipe them down, taking care to straighten the feathers one at a time. When one feather came out, Sam winced. "That didn't hurt, did it?"

Lucifer shook his head. "No, Sam, it didn't. In fact, it feels good." His voice was a bit strangled as he was trying to keep his desires in check.

Sam paused at hearing the tone, then at the archangel's breathing. He smiled faintly as he continued with his work. Once he had gotten four of the six wings done, he realized that the wings were actually a brilliant blood red color. He wanted to hurry with the other two, but at the same time, he was enjoying himself. That thought brought him up short. He paused, the eighth cloth he was using just sitting there against the wing.

"Sam? Is there something wrong?" Lucifer's voice was almost dreamlike. He was clearly enjoying being groomed, having relaxed into it halfway through the first wing.

"No." Sam continued on the wing. "Since you're trusting me, I guess I should tell you that I don't really know what I'm really feeling. All I do know is that I don't want you to go away." He focused on a particularly stubborn tangle of feathers. "I want you near me, but I don't know what to make of that."

Lucifer bit back a groan as the tangle worked free, shedding several feathers out, under Sam's fingers. Once he was sure it wouldn't break free, he nodded slowly. "Sam, I've hurt you in the past. I don't expect you to forgive me immediately. I only beg that you give me a chance to show you how much I could love you." He shook his head when Sam froze. "Sam, I will love you however you need me to love you. If it is just as a friend, then that is what I will be." He smiled to himself as the grooming continued.

Sam bit his lower lip lightly as he focused on finishing the wings. Once they were done, he leaned back, staring at the six wings.

Lucifer pulled them back in, letting all but two disappear. He turned to look at Sam, not saying anything.

Sam wasn't sure who made the first move. All he knew was that his hands were gripping Lucifer's shirt and Lucifer's arms were around him. Their mouths were pressed together, tongues fighting for dominance.

Lucifer growled into the kiss, but allowed Sam to push him down on his back, feeling Sam settle down on top of him. He tightened his hold on Sam, rocking his hips upward.

Sam felt Lucifer's hardness against his own and he pulled back. He stood up, shaking his head, not looking at Lucifer. "I can't... I'm sorry." He fled to the bathroom, closing the door behind him, and sank to the floor in tears.

Lucifer stared after Sam in shock before he was able to stand up and approach the bathroom door. He listened for half a second before seeking out Gabriel.


	11. Chapter 11

Gabriel was laying on the bed in the other motel room,shirtless, but at least he had his jeans on still. Dean wasn't laying with him, but the sound of the shower told where he was. He looked up as Lucifer flew in, looking around in a panic. "What is it?" He immediately went into defensive mode, his grace flowing outward to check for threats.

Lucifer shook his head. "He was opening up to me, Gabriel. I don't know what I did. I was letting him be in control. He just got up and said he was sorry. Now he's in the bathroom crying." The words just tumbled out. He looked at Gabriel, tears starting to form in his own eyes.

Gabriel stood up and pulled his older brother into a hug. "It's not you, Lu. It's not. He's confused. It's not easy to go from thinking someone is your enemy to having a soul deep connection with that same person. He's been so set on saying no to you, that it's so hard to say yes now."

Lucifer allowed the comfort. "I just want to give him anything and everything he wants. It hurts when he turns me away, Gabriel."

Gabriel stroked Lucifer's hair. "I know it does. Believe me, I know. I was with Dean's soul for almost four hundred years before he became belligerent. Didn't want to even talk to me. Following reincarnation, everything was fine again." He glanced up as Dean came out of the bathroom.

Lucifer trembled at the thought. "How did you handle it?" He didn't even notice when Dean came out of the bathroom. He was that far down in his insecurity.

"I almost didn't. I kept reminding myself that I would meet him again. Give him time, Blue. Go at his speed." Gabriel looked over at Dean, then ran a hand over Lucifer's back to let him know it would be ok. "Dean, go check on Sam. He may be locked in the bathroom. Something happened that scared him. I don't think it was caused by Lucifer."

Dean nodded and threw some clothes on and went to Sam's room. He knocked, then let himself in.

Sam had come out of the bathroom and was sitting on the bed looking miserable. He looked up when Dean came in. "Please tell me he's next door?"

Dean nodded. "Yeah. Gabriel asked me to come check on you. Want to talk?"

Sam sighed. "It's just, well, he's a guy. I don't know..." He runs his fingers through his hair.

Dean nearly choked. "Umm, well, damn it, Sammy. Go do some research."

Sam frowned and half glared at Dean. "You're no help. Just go tell him to get his ass back over here."

Dean nodded and started to leave. "Sam, if you need or want advice, please, ask Gabriel. He's just, well, more comfortable with talking about it, okay?"

Sam made a noncommittal noise, but nodded. He watched as Dean left. He counted to ten, then to twenty, then to thirty, by the time he reached forty, Lucifer was back. Sam breathed a sigh of relief. "You didn't do anything wrong, okay?"

Lucifer leaned up against the wall, folding his arms over his chest, curling in on himself, but he nodded. "Can you tell me what happened?"

Sam took a deep breath. "I've never been with a guy. Okay? I just freaked out, I guess." He looked up at Lucifer. "I can't promise it won't happen again, but I think it's best if we take this slow."

Lucifer looked at Sam, a spark of hope in his eyes. "Okay, Sam, we'll take it slow." He let a small smile grace his lips as he watched Sam. "Do you want me to stay? I know you're tired."

Sam nodded without hesitation. "Yeah, I do." He waited a moment to see what Lucifer would do. When he didn't move, he laid down on the bed, looking at his archangel. "Will you at least lay down with me?"

Lucifer's breath caught in his throat as he looked at Sam. He finally nodded and crossed the room. He kicked off his shoes and settled down on his back next to Sam. He turned his head to look at his bondmate. He didn't say a word. He didn't need to.

Sam waited until Lucifer settled down before he moved to his side and, slowly and hesitantly, rested his head on Lucifer's chest. He suddenly felt the soft feathers surround him like a blanket and he slipped into sleep with a sigh and a smile. That night, he dreamed of what his life could be if he truly accepted the archangel into his life, of how happy he could be, of how loved and cherished he would be.

\--------------------

Sam sat across from Gabriel. "I don't know what to think."

Gabriel smiled at Sam, shaking his head. "Sam, the bond will make you feel things. It's up to you if you want to act on it. I told you that when I first met Dean's soul, we were not lovers. It was only because it was considered taboo at the time. Even with him knowing I wasn't mortal made no difference. Other than Dean, as he is now, that was the only other incarnation that knew who I am. He knew back then that angels have no gender. He still didn't want physical intimacy. In fact, he didn't want me to even stay with him while he slept."

Sam frowned. "So how did you manage to bond with him?"

Gabriel chuckled. "We were very good friends. Plus I saved his life more than once. He may have known my true name, but he never used it." He leaned in toward Sam. "Would you believe he was a priest back then?"

Sam blinked and shook his head in amusement. "Dean. A priest?" He started to chuckle.

Gabriel nodded with a smirk. "Yup. I was his patron saint. You can imagine the shock when he realized that I was also Loki."

Sam groaned, but laughed. "If he was anything like Dean is now, I'd imagine the reaction was somewhat colorful."

Gabriel shook his head with a smirk. "Sam, he was a priest. Well, okay, acolyte. It was also ten fifty three. His reaction was not colorful. He was very disappointed in me at first. Kept trying to get me to be an angel again."

Sam shrugged. "Good to know that he had sense back then." A pause. "Wait, ten fifty three? You've known him that long?" He wowed as Gabriel nodded. "So how did you bond?"

Gabriel shrugged. "I took him along on some of my more mundane pranks. He thought they were hilarious. We also talked a lot. Mostly about religion. He was so inquisitive. Of course, he attracted the attention of a lot of supernatural critters. He refused to believe in them at first, but after the first demon attack, and seeing how I smote the crap outta it, he was quick to change his mind."

Sam nodded, wide-eyed. "How often was his soul a target?"

"Every incarnation once I showed up to be with his soul." Gabriel sighed. "You weren't always with him, Sam, but more often than not, your soul was nearby to his. At first, I was a bit jealous, but when I realized that you had the markings of a bondmate on your soul, I knew that dad was just making sure that you and Dean would be together when you found your angel so I wouldn't have to be alone anymore."

"You just didn't expect it to be Lucifer, right?" Sam looked down at the floor.

Gabriel shook his head. "No, but I also didn't expect him to be released before his time out was over. When you wouldn't listen to me and did let him out, I knew the possibility was there. I wasn't certain though. I had to make sure Luci saw you with his own eyes."

"But he did see me before that time in Carthage." Sam started to speak again, but stopped when Gabriel held up a hand.

"It doesn't work on the dreamscape. The angel has to physically look into the eyes of their bondmate on this plane. Once that happens, the angel feels a pull to be near to that soul." Gabriel frowns. "Pull isn't really the right word, but nothing else can come close. Dad manipulated things so I'd find Dean's soul without seeing him. I felt the pull without ever seeing him. Once I did see him, it was like everything just fell into place. I'd do anything for him." He sighed.

"And Lucifer would do anything for me?" Sam seemed a little uncertain.

Gabriel nodded solemnly. "Yes, Sam, he will. He already did the one thing that none of us believed he ever would, and it was because you asked him to."

"Ask for forgiveness." Sam looked at Gabriel, tears in his eyes. "I love him, Gabriel, I just don't know if I can, well, love him."

Gabriel chuckled. "Sam, Blue told me that when dad forgave him, He left it up to you as to how Blue would come back to this plane. You chose his form."

Sam frowned in confusion. "He told me the Flip-flop story, but Blue?"

Gabriel shrugged. "Sure, change the subject." He smirked when Sam squirmed. "His favorite color. Ask him about it. Now that Mikey doesn't seem to want to kill him, he's been okay with the nickname." He smiles wistfully. "You know, Lucifer practically raised me. I think I was closer to him than I was to anyone else, Dad included." He folded his arms over his chest. "When he and Mikey started fighting over humanity, I couldn't bear it. I love both of them and I didn't want to have to choose between them, so I left."

Sam nodded and reached out to rest a hand on Gabriel's shoulder. "I understand. What would you have done if you couldn't have left?"

Gabriel snorted, but he didn't turn away from the small comfort. "I would have sided with Lucifer." He looked down. "Not because I thought he was right, but because it seemed like he was really the only one who truly gave a damn about me. Mikey's idea of teaching me to fly was like shoving me off a cliff after clipping my wings. I know he wasn't doing it to be mean, but he just had no clue how to handle the little ones. If it hadn't been for Lucifer, a lot of angels would have been a lot worse off. He always had a nurturing nature."

Sam was silent for a moment before looking at Gabriel. "I thought about Jess when I was given that choice, but it didn't fit."

Gabriel nodded. "You're his bondmate, Sam. It's normal to be attracted to him. No matter what form he is in, you'll be attracted. If you only want to be friends, he will accept that. He will be whatever you need him to be, Sam. Friend, lover, protector, whatever you need. When Dean finally called for me this time, he needed me to be a friend. In time, that changed. Right now, just get to know Blue. Let him be your friend. If you need time alone, he'll give it to you. The only thing that will hurt both of you is if you shut him out. I only ask that you both work toward completing the bond first. You both need that badly. For him, it will allow him to anticipate your needs and wants. For you, well, the way Dean always described it was that it was a feeling of belonging."

Sam sighed and nodded. "I don't know how I want him in my life. I just know that I do want him there. Part of me wants him as a friend. The other part, well..." He can't control the blush.

Gabriel nodded and reached out, laying his hand on Sam's. "I understand, Sam. One of Dean's incarnations was like that. He wanted me as a friend, but also as a lover. I didn't push him and we remained friends only. Lucifer will not push you either. He may want to be lovers, but that is because angels were made from love. Sure we're soldiers too, but we were made to love. When we find our bondmates, we want nothing more than to love them."

Sam was silent for a moment, the looked at Gabriel. "What would you recommend?"

Gabriel leaned back, sighing. "Sam, Lucifer is my brother. I want him to be happy. Obviously, I want for you to accept him in your life as a lover, because that will make him happiest. However, I can't tell you what's best for you. You'll pick whatever you are most comfortable with. My best advice is to take it slow." He smirked. "Not to embarrass Dean, but it took us four years from the time he called me until we became lovers. He was already in love with me. He just wanted to focus on you instead."

Sam blinked and shook his head. "He chose me over you?"

Gabriel nodded. "He always has. He sold his soul for you, Sam. I nearly lost him completely then. Hells, I asked Bobby to kill me at one point. He wouldn't. I almost came to you even though you'd told me you would kill me. I didn't want to live. I was almost to that point when Heaven mounted their rescue. I waited then. I was ready to jump in if necessary, but Cas did a good job of grabbing Dean out of there." He sighed. "If I had gone alone, I don't think I would have been successful. I might have ended up on the rack myself." He shuddered.

Sam sighed. "Sorry about that, by the way. I don't think I would have actually killed you. Once I calmed down, I realized you were hurting just as much as I was, if not more."

Gabriel snorted, but nodded. "I know, Sam. I know. For us, to lose your bondmate, it's the worst thing that can happen. We told you that it would drive Lucifer insane. That, honestly, is putting it lightly. It's much worse. I was useless those four months. The only hope I had was after they went in to get Dean out." He sighed and looked at Sam, watching his reactions. "Lucifer is used to the cage. He won't think clearly if anything happens to you. When Dean's first incarnation died, I was frantic. I almost returned to Heaven to search for him there when I found him again as a child. I watched him, protected him, but didn't let him know about me. Not until he was an adult. That's when I realized that as long as I stayed on Earth, his soul would come back to me."

Sam leaned back. He was about to speak again when Dean opened the door and dropped a couple bags of food on the table.

Dean looked between the two, then paused in his unloading. "Private discussion?"

Gabriel looked at Sam with a raised brow.

Sam shook his head. "No, not really. Just trying to figure out what to do regarding Lucifer."

Dean handed Sam his salad, then stuffed a French fry in his mouth. "Well, if you want my opinion..." He waited for Sam to nod. "First, eat your rabbit food, then go next door, call your angel, and fuck him." He snickered at the sudden blush and shifting in place Sam exhibited.

Gabriel snapped up a chocolate shake and shook his head. He shrugged at Sam.

After a minute, Sam stood up and took his salad next door to eat in peace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is almost done. 1 or 2 more chapters at most. I may write a sequel if there are enough requests for one.


	12. Chapter 12

Michael stood across from Raphael. "You can't know that He still intends for me to fight Lucifer."

Raphael sighed and closed his eyes. "It is written, Michael, therefore it must happen."

Michael shook his head. "It is also written that no angel shall slay a bonded angel." He levelled a cold gaze on his brother. "The damage to the human soul would be too great. There are two ways to create a demon, brother."

"How can we be certain?" A female voice drifted through, behind Michael. "He does bend the truth, even lying at times."

Michael turned his head to look at the angel, then shook his head. "True that he has twisted words, but Lucifer has never lied to me. You didn't see the look in his eyes. You didn't hear the panic in his voice. He is bound to Sam Winchester, Naomi."

Naomi huffed and shook her head. "You still must fight him, Michael. It is written."

Michael looked back at Raphael, hoping for some back up. When it was not forthcoming, he looked back at Naomi. "Gabriel is alive, Naomi. He is alive and bound to Dean Winchester. I cannot use him as my vessel. There is no way possible. I will be forced to kill Gabriel."

Naomi stared at Michael in disbelief. "So, you will let Lucifer walk the Earth unchecked?"

Michael growled toward Naomi. "He is doing no harm. Father forgave him for his sins. He is one of us once again. I will not fight him."

Naomi left in a flutter of wings, irritated yet set on getting things back on track.

Several days later, every angel that Michael spoke to began encouaging Michael to fight Lucifer as planned. After several months, he acquiesced. So the angels raised Adam as he still refused to take Dean as his vessel. He wan't willing to condemn both bonded angels. It was hard enough knowing that he was condemning Sam to a fate worse than death.

\------------------------

Between the two archangels and Castiel, they felt the return of soul to body. Castiel was sent to investigate. Upon his return with Adam, all three angels knew what the others were planning.

That night, Sam curled against Lucifer, feeling the soft wings around him as a blanket. "Why are they still doing this?"

Lucifer sighed. "Sam, Michael apparently still despises me. It obviously doesn't matter to him or the others that I've been forgiven and allowed back into the fold. Dad hasn't shown back up to stop him, so I can only conclude that Michael will come after me. I thought things were different now. I really did." He felt Sam shake his head and begin to tremble. Lucifer gently caressed Sam's back and tightened his wings around his bondmate. "Sam, calm down. Gabriel and Castiel have both agreed to stand with me against Michael. Little Castiel is still looking for dad. With luck, he will find Him and things will settle down."

Sam managed to stop shaking, though he clung tighter to his bondmate. "I can't lose you. Not when I've only just found you." He almost laughed at the thought that went through his head. If anyone had told him this time last year that he'd fall in love with the devil and be the cause of the devil's return to grace, he'd have laughed himself to death. Now? Now he was just praying that he wouldn't lose Lucifer.

Lucifer moved so he could look at Sam. "You won't." While his tone was certain, Sam could still see the uncertainty in his eyes.

Sam stared at Lucifer for a moment, seeing the fear mirrored back at him. When he spoke again, his voice was soft, unsure, and he knew it was exactly what Lucifer had been waiting for months to hear. "Make love to me?"

Lucifer's wings uncurled as he gently guided Sam on to his back. His wings folded in against his back as he began to kiss over Sam's chest, hands caressing whatever skin he could find. "Be sure, Sam. Once we start this dance, I don't think I will be able stop."

"I'm sure. I want this. Need this." Sam bit his lower lip to keep from making any sounds. This was not something they'd done before. Sam had slept in Lucifer's arms, but never had they made love. They had kissed, but Sam had always stopped Lucifer from removing any clothing, though recently, he'd been okay with no shirts on occasion.

Lucifer's hands ran over the top of Sam's jeans. His mouth was latched on to Sam's left nipple, but he still felt the silent agreement coming from Sam. He unfastened Sam's jeans and started to inch them down.

Sam lifted his hips to assist. When he felt Lucifer tugging a bit too harshly, he let out a breathy laugh and reached down to help. Between the two of them, Sam's jeans were soon on the floor, along with his boxers. He looked down at Lucifer just as Lucifer looked up at him.

"You are so beautiful, Sam. So beautiful, and so mine." Lucifer took hold of Sam's cock in his hand and, with his eyes locked on Sam's, relishing the full body flush that marked how much Sam agreed with his words, lowered his mouth down, taking Sam in. He had never done this before, but he knew how to. He saw it in Sam's mind and soul. He knew what was going to bring Sam pleasure.

Sam watched Lucifer sink down, taking most of his cock in his mouth. He let his head fall back on the pillow then, one hand on the back of Lucifer's head, the other gripping the sheets. It took everything he had to keep from jerking his hips upward and choking Lucifer.

Lucifer smiled to himself as he felt the tenseness in Sam. He had wanted this kind of closeness, but had never asked for it. He kept himself from daring to hope that Sam might want this too.

Sam closed his eyes and tried to relax. It was impossible with the things Lucifer's mouth was doing. He almost jumped when he felt a slick finger press against his hole. He forced himself to relax enough for that finger to gain entry. He bit his lip to keep from crying out.

Lucifer worked his finger in Sam, letting his body adjust before working him open. Two fingers followed shortly, then three. All the while, he kept Sam distracted by his mouth. When he was sure Sam was ready, he slipped his fingers out and pulled away.

Sam opened his eyes and started to protest when he realized that Lucifer was shedding his jeans. He watched with wide eyes, finally truly aware of what they were about to do. He drew in a breath as a touch of fear grabbed him. When Lucifer felt it, Sam was quick to grab hold of his arms and pull him down.

Lucifer smiled as he was all but yanked down on top of Sam. He settled in close, pulling Sam's legs up. He felt Sam's hand, slick with lube, take hold of his cock, stroking him. He kissed Sam, moaning against his lips when he felt Sam guiding him in. He thrust forward, breaching Sam's body.

Sam did cry out in both pain and pleasure. Lucifer felt like he was going to tear him apart, but at the same time, the fullness felt damned good. He forced himself to relax and when he did, the pain dulled away. He cried out again against Lucifer's mouth when he felt him begin to move.

Lucifer kept a slow steady pace, not wanting to hurt Sam further. He was pleasantly surprised when Sam began to move under him, hands gripping at his hips to pull him down harder. He complied with Sam's desires, thrusting harder into him.

Sam's eyes rolled back as he broke the kiss to gasp in air. His head tilted back and he moaned loudly when Lucifer began to suck at Sam's neck. His hands gripped tightly at Lucifer's hips, pulling him down as he moved upward. He came without warning, coating their stomachs.

Lucifer growled when he felt Sam contracting around him. He thrust twice more before losing complete control. His grace burst forward, surrounding Sam, filling him, and connecting with him. He felt the bond that they had been working toward fall into completion. He tried to stay quiet, but it was a lost cause. His true voice cried out Sam's name as glass shattered around them.

\-----------------------------

Two days later, two archangels stood against one. Three humans kept back out of the way. Sam and Dean were powerless in this fight and they knew it. Bobby watched on with the same amount of fear that the brothers felt.

Michael kept his attention on Lucifer when he spoke. "I never thought you'd side with a fallen angel, Gabriel."

"Dad restored him, or did you miss that memo?" Gabriel spouted off. "I stand with him against you since he is bondmate to the brother of the one I love. Does Heaven even know you're declaring war on a bonded angel?"

Michael still watched Lucifer, though his blade dropped into his hand. "I was willing to let this go because of the bond. The others pushed for it."

Lucifer sighed. "Michael, brother, I don't want to fight you, but I will if you pursue this. Please." Lucifer's eyes implored Michael. "Please put away your blade and walk with me the way we used to." He held out a hand to Michael.

Gabriel let his blade drop to his hand a split second after Michael lunged for Lucifer. He managed to get in between them and block the blow.

Everyone ignored the twin cries from the brothers. Their mates were in danger and they were helpless. They looked at each other before searching the trunk of the Impala for anything that might help. Upon pulling out holy oil and starting to form a Molotov to launch toward Michael, the brothers slumped down unconscious. Bobby started to shout out a warning, but he joined the brothers.

Seconds before Michael would have delivered a fatal blow to Gabriel, a strong gust of wind knocked Michael back.

From behind the three humans, a familiar voice sounded. "Enough!" Gabriel turned to the new threat, his eyes landing on Dean, unconscious, but unharmed. Sam and Bobby were in a similar state. Castiel stood behind Chuck Shurley as the bedraggled author surveyed the area.

Chuck didn't look at the humans. He strode forward, taking in the battlefield. He sighed as he looked down at Michael. "I thought it would have been clear when I decided that he'd suffered enough."

Michael looked up, then away. "I didn't want this. Please, believe me."

Lucifer and Gabriel both fell to their knees in relief and reverence, blades dropped to their sides. Neither one spoke, though their hands found the other's and held tight, needing the reassurance that this was real.

Chuck knelt beside Michael. "I know, but you had a choice." He reached out and gripped hold of Michael's wrist before he could scoot away. "You chose to pursue this rather than show the same forgiveness that I did. I thought you would be better than this. I am sad to see I was mistaken." A bright flash surrounded Michael and Adam fell back, unconscious.

Chuck stood up and went to Lucifer and Gabriel. He knelt in front of them and pulled both of them into a hug. The two archangels immediately clung to Chuck, both in tears. The reunion was brief and over far too soon. Chuck pulled back and caressed Gabriel's cheek. "Yes, it was me. You needed a kick in the ass to get you where you were supposed to be, Gabriel." He ignored the look of indignation on Gabriel's face as he wiped away Lucifer's tears. "That was all that was needed, my precious Morningstar." He pressed a kiss to the angel's foreheads in turn and stood up. As Chuck disappeared, though the archangels begged him not to go yet, Dean, Sam, and Bobby woke and got to their feet.

Adam blinked his eyes open and stood up, then went to his half-brothers. "It's me. Michael is gone."

"Gone? Gone where?" Dean frowned at Adam before looking back toward Gabriel.

"Michael is in time-out." Gabriel retorted as he and Lucifer stood up and were slammed into by their respective mates. After the human brothers had assured themselves that their partners were not injured, Bobby spoke up. "What the hell do you mean by time-out?"

The archangels looked at Castiel briefly before returning their attentions to their mates. Castiel looked at Bobby. "Michael is in the cage."

Bobby blinked twice then nodded. "So all the time Lucifer was down there was what, one big time-out?"

Castiel nodded, watching the two pairs a bit wistfully. "Yes. He was released before his time was up. I believe Father had a hand in it."

Bobby nodded, looking back at the pairs. He rolled his eyes and turned back t Castiel. "Come on. At least we don't have to sit here and watch this." He started to walk away. He wasn't surprised when Castiel and Adam caught up with him.

Both of them missed it when Gabriel and Lucifer took Dean and Sam away, but when they looked back, they only saw open space marred with gravestones.

Bobby could only shake his head and mutter, "Idjits." He looks at Castiel. "Do you have one of those bondmates too?"

Castiel shakes his head. "No. I have yet to find mine. I have never before felt the necessity to locate mine."

Bobby nods once and opens the door to the Impala. "But now you do?" He doesn't wait for an answer before climbing in behind the wheel.

Adam and Castiel follow, Cas taking shotgun and Adam in the back. "Yes, though Father has assured me that I will meet my bondmate when it is time. I find that I am impatient."

Adam leans forward. "Bondmates? What am I missing?"

Bobby turns the radio on and up. Adam sinks back in the seat with a frown. Castiel just stared out of the window.

It was over. They had won. Maybe, just maybe, they might get the happy ending they were looking for. Of course, things never work out quite the way they want it to, but that, well, that is another story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally got it done. I hope everyone had as much fun reading this as I had writing this. I do plan on a sequel, but I'm not sure of the time frame for it yet.


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